Saturday Night’s Alright(For Fighting)

These People Were Born

1894 – shoe banging commie, Nikita Khrush”Control”chev

1897 – Mike Seaver starred in the stage version of Thornton “Mellon” Wilder’s Our Town

1918 – bridge destroyer, William “know when to” Holden

1938 – Richard “somehow I got to direct Return of the Jedi Marquand

1947 – Ian “The Emperor” McDiarmid

1948 – Miami Vice theme-maker, Jan “Arm &” Hammer

1954 – best wrestler ever next to Junkyard Dog, “Rowdy” Roddy Piper

1957 – author whose books make cheesy movies, Nick Hornb”all”y

1959 – Boromir, shmoromir, Sean “My Name Doesn’t Rhyme” Bean

1961 – footballer and all around dumb-ass, “Baby” Boomer Esiason

1963 – brother of Bill, Joel “One Crazy Summer” Murray

1967 – songstress with the lyric, “I’ll fuck you ’til your dick is blue”, Liz “Play” Phair

1970 – the forgotten bad guy from a Mega Man game, Redman

1972 – Jennifer “14 going on 15 minutes of fame” Garner

1974 – Posh Spice, Victoria “I hate sex messaging” Beckham



Two can play that game Becks!
Here’s a photo of Posh’s text messaging buddy.


And This Shit Happened

1492 – Spain and Christopher Columbus sign a contract for him to sail to Asia to get (11 herbs and) spices, so they could open their own KFC franchise.

1524 – Giovanni da Verrazano reaches New York harbor. He didn’t have his EZ Pass on him so he had to fork over $8 bones.

1924 – Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer studios is formed. 80 years later they release Agent Cody Banks 2 and almost have to close their doors for good.

1964 – Ford Motor Company unveils the Mustang car. American drivers can now look as cool as Europeans, but not really.

1975 – Cambodia falls to the Khmer Rouge. Boobies still a flappin at the Moulin Rouge.



The real reason
behind Columbus’ journey.

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