Saturday Night’s Alright(For Fighting)
These People Were Born
1894 – shoe banging commie, Nikita Khrushâ€Controlâ€chev
1897 – Mike Seaver starred in the stage version of Thornton “Mellon†Wilder’s Our Town
1918 – bridge destroyer, William “know when to†Holden
1938 – Richard “somehow I got to direct Return of the Jedi Marquand
1947 – Ian “The Emperor†McDiarmid
1948 – Miami Vice theme-maker, Jan “Arm &†Hammer
1954 – best wrestler ever next to Junkyard Dog, “Rowdy†Roddy Piper
1957 – author whose books make cheesy movies, Nick Hornbâ€allâ€y
1959 – Boromir, shmoromir, Sean “My Name Doesn’t Rhyme†Bean
1961 – footballer and all around dumb-ass, “Baby†Boomer Esiason
1963 – brother of Bill, Joel “One Crazy Summer†Murray
1967 – songstress with the lyric, “I’ll fuck you ’til your dick is blueâ€, Liz “Play†Phair
1970 – the forgotten bad guy from a Mega Man game, Redman
1972 – Jennifer “14 going on 15 minutes of fame†Garner
1974 – Posh Spice, Victoria “I hate sex messaging†Beckham
Two can play that game Becks!
Here’s a photo of Posh’s text messaging buddy.
And This Shit Happened
1492 – Spain and Christopher Columbus sign a contract for him to sail to Asia to get (11 herbs and) spices, so they could open their own KFC franchise.
1524 – Giovanni da Verrazano reaches New York harbor. He didn’t have his EZ Pass on him so he had to fork over $8 bones.
1924 – Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer studios is formed. 80 years later they release Agent Cody Banks 2 and almost have to close their doors for good.
1964 – Ford Motor Company unveils the Mustang car. American drivers can now look as cool as Europeans, but not really.
1975 – Cambodia falls to the Khmer Rouge. Boobies still a flappin at the Moulin Rouge.
The real reason
behind Columbus’ journey.