Big Apple IIc or Not To See?

New York, I Love You
Heart of Larkness
Trailers & Mo | Official Website

I love New York, and so do you. If we didn’t, what kinda persons would we be? Maybe persons who are lamer than people who owned a LeCar? Speaking of things French, I love Paris, and you do too! And if you didn’t then obviously you’ve never been to the Musée d’Orsay. So many people loved Paris that they made a movie consisting of many short movies professing this love and the love that can be found within, aptly named Paris, Je T’Aime. As planned, New York was up next, same deal, but not same result. Je T’Aime was filled with half goodies and half whatevs.net, but all in all it still maintained our interest throughout. The hit to miss ratio (STILL not the same as comparing Stanley Nickels to Schrute Bucks) for New York, I Love You is much munch lower. And how could it not be when Paris had directors like Tom Twyker, the Coen Bros, Alexander Payne, Olivier Assayas, Wes Craven, Gus Van Sant, et al, and NY got stuck with Brett Ratner(!!!), Allen Hughes, and second-time short maker Natalie Portman (Scar Jo’s entry didn’t make the final cut). The large NY cast may be a bit mo namey than the City of Light’s joint (Shia LaBeouf, Bradley Cooper, Natalie Portman, Orlando Bloom, Hayden Christensen, Rachel Bilson, Robin Wright Penn, Drea de Matteo, Ethan Hawke, Olivia Thirlby, John Hurt, James Caan, Chris Cooper, Anton Yelchin, Maggie Q, Andy Garcia, Julie Christie, Cloris Leachman, Eli Wallach, Burt Young and Irrfan Khan), but pretty faces cannot mask the not so pretty underneathages. And burst of all, the stories themselves don’t really feel very New Yorkie. If Woody/Coppola/Scorsese couldn’t make New York Stories work, how could 10+ directors with not as much skill do one or 10 better?

Love Is Never Having To Say You Play Sorry: what do we love most about NY? there’s too many wondrous thangs from the food, to all dem movies to the pot delievery service to choose juss one, so how about the wurstest??? hands AND thighs down – summer sweating on the subway platform. sure, it’s nice not to own a car and deal with all that crap, but endless cases of swamp a$$ shouldn’t be the reward for being more green than the rest of you folks

Verdictgo: Sum Merit But No Stinkin Badges

NY, I Heart You opens in limited release today

and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…

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