Snore-ge Co-Stanzas
06. Oct, 2009 
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Bright Star
More Boretic Than Poetic
Trailers & Mo | Official Website
John Keats (Ben Whishaw, always at home in period piece garb and dialog) was a poet. That much we already knew. Apparently he totally sweated his landlady’s daughter (Abbie Cornish, as cute as a peach AND a plum!), never got to bone her cause back then people didn’t usually bone people they weren’t married to and he couldn’t marry her cause he had no money prospects and then there’s the whole thing about him dying at the not so ripe age of 25. That much we didn’t know, and now that you know, the only thing yer missing from the picture is the two of them lying in a field of flowers, against a tree, on top of trees, on a couch, on the floor, doing not much else besides a lil kissy kissy here and there, and flubvs course, since this is about a poet, his muse and his poetry, saying sweet nothings. There is no question that Jane Campion has pieced together quite the gorgeous looking film on love without the lust. There is a question as to how much you can take of the sweet nothings that ultimately lead to nothing but heartbreak. Waiting turns out to be not such sweet sorrow. Keats’ BFF Charles Brown (David Gordon Green-grasser Paul Schneider, doing his wurstest Scotty from Star Trek impersonation) is yet another thorn in the lover’s doomed affair. He wants Keats all to himself, in an intellectual way, but based on the way he treats women and fondles Keats’ balls, it might be in a sexual way as well. Hactually, anyone who encounters Keats in the film instantly becomes enamored with him (esp Cornish’s fam, featuring that kid from Love Actually, Kerry Fox and lil newcomer Edie Martin), well, everyone cept for us. Poetry in motion? More like poetry in motionless!
Bonfire Crotches: Abbie Cornish Hornish-dawg is juss one of the 31 beyond beautiful ladies that make up The Vanities Girls
Verdictgo: Sum Merit But No Stinkin Badges
Bright Star is currently playing in limited release at a theater probably near jews
and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…
