William H. Macy Seen Buying Graduation Balloons Amid College Admissions Scandal [People]

the year was 2010.  movies were shown.  a lot em had to do with women in trouble, some blurred the lines between fiction and fact, a bunch were needlessly retrofitted to 3-D, and in the end, they were all juss a bunch of movieses.  18 of these flicks were bester than the others, and in our mumble opinion, we giveth you…

The Barely Legal Eighteensies

1) Black Swan

Natalie Portman masturbates!!!  that single sentence is enuff bestness for being bestest of the year bestnness worthy, but how about the meticulous Darren Aronofsky accomplishing the impossible task (more so than making a movie about the making of a website interesting) by making a movie about the ballet udderly mindblowing???? we haven’t been this psychologically broken since Jacob’s Ladder!  she WAS perfect! so was Vincent Cassel

2) Fish Tank

Coming of age in plastic America is for wussies, but coming of age in chavish England is sum real tough shit.  juss ask Fish Tank‘s heroine Mia Williams.  Hactually don’t ask her, and simply watch and marvel at Katie Jarvis’ embodiment of her heart & soul, and in the process hand in the finest performance of any actor we saw this year, in one of the most vastly under-seen dynamite films of the year!!!

3) Enter The Void

Once you enter, you will never exit, and if you are able to somehow exit, we’re sure the gift shop would be filled with nothing but hallucinogenic neon cum drops.  Still want to enter?  Who knew that Gaspar Noé could out Gaspar Noé Gaspar Noé!?!?!?!  This one will be talked about for ages, even if we never want to see it again, EVER.  had we hactually enjoyed it, it probably woulda been our true pick for #1.  9reals

3.5) Dogtooth

Saw this one a lil too late, but it’s never too late to add the 3.5th bestestest movie of 2010 to the breast of list, cause dude, DOGTOOOOOOOOOOOOOTH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

4) Blue Valentine

You Always Hurt The One You Love

5) Carlos

319 minutes never felt so well used.  Carlos is the little brother of Zodiac & Munich, and those are 2 of the finest films of the past decade!! now can someone make a killer Patty Heart flick?

6) I’m Still Here

We saw it before the jig was up, and even with the knowledge that it was all hoax, we still want to believe in the self-loathing and destruction of Joaquin Phoenix.  This is Spinal FAT!

7) The Social Network

It was great and all, but it’s still no Zodiac

8) Waking Sleeping Beauty

The House of Mouse stewed in a black cauldron for quite awhile, until the beast was magically turned back into a beauty once again.  If you’ve ever seen and loved a single Disney cartoon, you owe it to yourself to watch this amazingly honest tell-all

9) The Red Riding Trilogy

To the North, where they did whatever the bloody hell they wanted to do!!!  Part 1, In the Year of Our Lord 1974, was the cream of the trilogy crop, but all 3 puzzle pieces are required for optimal picture quality

10) Best Worst Movie

A title that’s more apt than Apt Pupil, even if you’ve never even heard of Troll 2 before.  No worries, as they catch you up on the forgettable then and the unbelievable now, and it’s all for a wonderful eternity.  George Hardy, best wurst dentist/actor EVER!!!!!!

11) Exit Through The Gift Shop

What is art?  What is a documentary?  What is Banksy‘s next cinematic move? And WHEN can we see it???

12) The Eclipse

Two things you are unaware of: Ciarán Hinds is the greatestestest living actor AND The Eclipse is 28393902 bajillion times better than anything having to do with vampires, werewolves and the pointless girl they all want to bang

13) Another Year

‘a film by Mike Leigh’ is all you need to know

14) The King’s Speech

We still want to give this movie a giant hug

15) Let Me In

The rare ‘American remake is better than the foreign original’ type dealio!!!!!

16) The Agony & The Ecstasy of Phil Spector

Courtroom drama is flawlessly juxtaposed with some of the mos eternal music ever recorded, and we all finally learn what the deal with this is/was!!!!! #BenWallace

17) Life During Wartime

It’s a sequel of Happiness, with all new actors AND vibrant colors!! how did this work??  dunno, but it did!!!

18) Step-Up 3-D

Even more so than Jackass, this is why 3-D was re-invented. BFAB 4 Life!!! 10reals!!!!!

and now for the…

Honor Blackmanable Mentions

127 Hours (look ma, no arm!), Animal Kingdom (bloomin onions!), Cyrus (John C Reilly & Jonah Hill were made for each other), The Ghost Writer (free Roman Polanski!!), The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo (Män Som Hatar Kvinnor) (guess what, she has a dragon tattoo!!!), Harry Potter 7.1 (best since #3!!!), Heartbreaker (the inevitable American remake will suck), Jackass 3-D (duh), Joan Rivers: A Piece of Work (what she said), The Tillman Story (operation freedom of information), Somewhere (it’s Lost In Translation, but hactually really darn good!), Toy Story 3 (duh pt 2), TRON 2 (bestest Daft Punk video everrrrrrr), Vincere (2 facist, 2 furious), When You’re Strange (faces come out of the rain!!)

stay pooned for our final Movies 2010 installment, when we drop a bunch of awards on people like it’s a hot lunch!

perv-iously on Thighs Wide Movies

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Exit Through The Gift Shop
Coronation Street Art
Official Website | Trailers & Mo

Street art is everywhere above ground, but for most of the past decade, the movement and its illegal defacing perpetrators have largely remained on the fringes of the underground.  That is no longer the case when a dude like Shepard Fairey‘s crafting iconic images for the Obama campaign and Banksy‘s designing album covers for Blur.  Their street art has now become a full-fledged commercial art phenomenon, and with big bucks at playand  pretenders jumping at the chance to cash in

The BRILLIANT new doc Exit Through The Gift Shop (narrated by Rhys Ifans) goes over all of this, under it, above it, behind it and beyond it.  It all starts and ends with a French expat living in America named Thierry Guetta.  He loved filming anything and everything, and after a light-bulb switching on moment when visiting his cousin Invader, he stumbled on his (first) calling: document the street artists in action.  And film he did, mainly after dark, scaling buildings that weren’t meant to be scaled, dodging coopers and amassing a garage full of tapes that he never watched.  Along the way he hooks up with Fairey and some other known artists, but his dream subject, the mysterious and most elusive Banksy, remains juss that, mysterious and elusive

Eventually he finds Banksy, they find kinship in one another, and then the two do something for each other.  Guetta, solid at filming, but lost in filmmaking, hands his tapes over to Banksy and BAM-O, Banksy becomes the director of the very documentary we’re blabbing about.  With nothing to do (cept he has a family who barely sees him), Banksy suggests to Guetta that he try his own hand at becoming a street artist, which only seems natural since he knows the ins and outs.  What Banksy didn’t know is that he created a monster and unleashed him on an very unsuspecting world.  The results are hilarious, shocking, and embarrassing, as the LA art world embraces Guetta, now going by the very fitting name Mr Brainwash, and his tacky/hacky art

Exit Through The Gift Shop has more to say about the state of art in modern times, than we have to say about fried chicken and boobs, and it knows what it’s talking about, juss like we do about chicken breasts and breasts.  Partner this with the one-sided, but totally revealing and enjoyable The Art of The Steal and you’ll have all the inside art school confidentiality you’d ever want to be privy to

Poster Haste Never Makes Waste: our mos flavorite street artist remains NY’s own Poster Boy

Verdictgo: Breast In Show

Gift keeps on giving in NY/LA/SF today and elsewhere elsewhen

and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…