Boggle The Lesser
Elektra Luxx
Ultra Suxxxxxxx
Official Website | Trailers & Mo
So, there’s this movie about a porn star with a heart of gold, and a pile of problems, played by everyone’s dream porn star Carla Gugino. It co-stars the likes of Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Marley Shelton, Timothy Olyphant, Emmanuelle Chriqui, Adrianne Palicki, Malin Akerman, Vincent Kartheiser, Lucy Punch, Justin Kirk, and even tosses in a cameo for Julianne Moore as the Virgin Mary!! Woah, that’s a ton of foxy ladies and some choice-y male funsters, and it’s sorta about porn!!! This could be sexy AND fun AND sexy fun!!! Right?
9,000,0,00000,00000,00% WRONG. Within 2.3 minutes you can tell that this is dread on arrival. How all these talented actors agreed to be in such a below-amateur production is more mind-boggling than playing Boggle against Dr Mindbender with only ‘Qu’ dice (see illustration at the bottom)!!! And worst yet, apparently this is a sequel to a movie we’ve never heard of called Women In Trouble. There must be something to the 1st one to warrant a 2nd pass, but we don’t even want to find out why, or even bother figuring out what secret info writer/director Sebastian Gutierrez has over these actors that he uses to blackmail them into acting in his greasy pieces of cruddddddddd. There’s already rumblings about a 3rd movie called Women In Ecstasy, or more like AUDIENCE IN MISERY: PART 3!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Repent For Your Sins: you can make yer own Carla Gugino porn movie by A-B repeating her fine NSFW work in Sin City. much easier on the eyes and ears than Luxxxxxxxx
Verdictgo: Slit Your Eyes Out Repoopulous
Luxx suxxxxxxxxxxxxx times like 9 bajillion in NY/LA/Boston & Seattle next Friday and hopefully nowhere after that
and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…