Qwikie Biznitz
31. Mar, 2004 
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– Michael Jackson wants to hold an AIDS benefit concert in Africa. Here are the reasons why:
1) So he can run away from the judicial system and never come back like Roman Polanski.
2) Africa is the only continent MJ hasn’t touched a child from.
3) Bubbles misses his family.
4) It’s the only place he can repair that oxygen chamber.
5) It’s his favorite Toto song.
– In more Jackson hell, Janet’s boob has ruined everything. A Nashville bar has covered up the nipples & boxes on photos of 19th-century Victorian women that adorn their menu. Eeesh. Will cream-filled donuts be outlawed next?
– The 77th edition of the Oscars, for the second straight year, will be held before the month o’ March. Nominations will be announced January 25th, 2005 and the show will be February 27, 2005. With no Lord of the Bling on next year’s docket, the winners will be less predictable. And thank Gad Renee Smellwager already got her gold man, cause I doubt that she and her dimples will win again. Note to the Academy: get rid of the Best Animated Feature category and replace it with Best CGI Character. Gollum was robbed.
