Sweating To The Moldies

I've returned from the dead and I want yer thighs shut!

– Who got 120K visitors to their site yesterday? No, not yer beloved Master o’ Thighs, but some shmuck-bag claiming to be Andy Kaufman. And if yer an idiot who really bee leaves that he’s alive or wastes even one minute czeching out his site, guess what, it’s all an f-in hoax. I have to come clean, yer humble The Thigh Master is none other than Rasputin. I survived the cyanide poisoning, getting shot 3 times, and being thrown into a river, just so I could tell you how hot Lindsay Lohan is!! [Link via Zach de la Roachclip and Jay Manhandler]

– Which celebrity will give birth to the next Apple, Pilot Inspektor Riesgraf (as in Jason) Lee, or Audio Science (as in Shannon) Sossamon? Only one place to find out, The Celebrity Baby Blog. [Link via Seeking Irony via Gothamist]

– Remember that 30 second version of The Exorcist starring bunnies? Well, herrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrre’s Johnny, bunny style. [Link via Popbitch]

His poop will grow weed on Neptune

– In space, no one can hear you poop, but NASA will recycle it for you!! Did you know that shit can be recycled and provide pure drinking water, fertilizer, and get this, electricity? At this very moment, astronaut applications are being torn up all over America. Where’s cosmonaut Lance Bass when you need him? [Link via P Diddy Robbins]

– What will be the least downloaded album of all time? The David Hasselhoff hip-hop project, produced by OG Ice-T, tentatively entitled, Hassle The Hoff. Phew, yer MC name is safe for now El Hofbergo!! [Link via My Man Marvkus]

The Office, is getting hosed by the Emmys. Who f-in cares, we all know it’s the breast show on television anywayz. But the real news is that the two specials produced for Christmas in the UK will be turned into a one-off American TV movie special. Details when available. [Link via Dicky Greenleaf]

– Recognize this uber fat guy from Varsity Blues and other movies where he played a fat guy:

welcome to Good Burger, can I eat your order?


Well, he had 16 plastic surgery operations, gastric bypass surgery and a procedure that removed three quarters of his stomach, and he now looks like this:

you call this an improvement?


What ever happened to just eating bacon wrapped in mayo? [Link via Julia Sistahs]

Omarosaâ„¢?

– Finally, from the “Inventions More Important Than Electricity” department:

women can finally turn off their f-in ringers!!

Dial An Orgasm!!

[Gawd bless you Ambient Cruise-spanko

for this s’wonderful link]

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