Remember WENN (part MIXLIX)
31. May, 2006 
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Sure, we missed the fiesta-tivi-tees-nutz by a week, but it’s never too late to celeBRAte the 20th annie verse airy one of the tres lamestest American things that did a lot of good from ’86 (which occurred a month after the disaster at Chernobyl): the bicoastal-4,125 miled-7 million-peopled human chain, that ran through 17 states, and included the likes of Mary Lou Retton, Coretta Scott King, Mickey Mouse, Rev Billy Graham, Oprah, Prince, Jane Fonda, Kenny Rogers, Brooke Shields, Jerry Seinfeld, and Rappin Ron, aka:
For some reason, unbeknownst to me, my family did not partake. Maybe we were too busy watching Mike Boddicker and the O’s whip up on the Mariners or goin coo-coo for Coco Puffs cause George Brett had his 2,000th hit, or maybe, JUST MAYBE, wees were trying for hours to pronounce the name of newly born António Pinhão Botelho. To this day, I feel like something’s been missing from my life, and this may be it… besides many a H-wood starlets riding my face like it was the Belmont Stakes. So, did any of you participate? If so, did I miss out on anything? Besides the pastability of gettin hand herpes from the person I woulda been linked together with.
Lynxsters for yer sphynxters…
• ABC news looks back
• Many a snap-pulls from the event
• Hands Across America, the VIDEO GAME
which was oddly made 3 years earlier
• Megan, an Akronite who wants to do it again on 7/7/07 at 7pm
• the Ramones’ ‘Hands Across Your Face’ parody
• The Simpsons ref [d]
• and flubvs course, how could we forget the ‘Hands Across America’ theme??? He’s a short clip of the song [d] and here’s one from the music video, which was directed by the same dude who foreva changed a young Stereogum’s life
