The British Bulldogs
15. Jan, 2007 
0 Comments
Notes On A Scandal & Venus
Two To Take Note Of
NOAS Trailer|Venus Trailers
If you’re old, miserable, rolling solo and happen to be living in not so sunny London, apparently you have only one option: latch yourself onto someone younger, livelier, and mos def, totally bangable. Such is the course of action for our films two main protagonists, NOAS‘s crotchety female Andy Rooney played by Dame Judi Dench and Venus‘s one foot in the grace actor Lothario played by Peter O’Toole. While neither story plays out to a contrived happy Hollywood ending (this is British cinema folks!), one is a bit less unsettling than the other, and oddly enuff its the one where a younger woman lets the protagonist smell her fingers after she removes it from her crotch! I won’t tell you which film contains this clammy roast beef odor, so I guess you’ll have to see both. Good thing, cause each film is worth czechin out for these two performances alone. And speakin of smelly jelly, how come nothing ever became of John Waters’ Odorama enhanced movie viewing techmology? Dats almos a bigger cryin shame than the dreck that Will Ferrell keeps starring in. Shake and bake? More like tame and lame.
Unsatisfied with these?: Netflix All-American Girl: The Mary Kay Letourneau Story & Harold & Maude [trailer]
Possible Porno Name: Nodes On An Anal & V-Necks & Penis
Apt MPupil3: Roy Orbison’s ‘Only The Lonely‘ [d]
IMDb Sweeney: the only other film to feature both O’Toole and his equally distinguished Venus co-star Leslie Phillips was… King Ralph!?!?
John Grisham’s Jizzum (aka Verdict): both Jeepers Worth A Peepers
Rental Round Up(dog)
super kwik edish
The Descent – the scariest bit was how un-hot the chicks were
All the King’s Men – if I wanted to bore myself watchin Sean Penn spew political babble, I woulda turned on CNN
The Wicker Man (Nic Cage versh) – not as awful as the critics made it out to be and not awful at all… seriously
World Trade Center – the better of the two 9/11 movies this year and the 2nd watchable Nic Cage movie of the year… haven’t been able to say that for ages
Thank You for Smoking – I’m sick to death of Aaron Eckhart. He’s starting to become a more annoying screen presence than Nic Cage!
The Black Dahlia – Brian De Palma takes a break from ripping off Hitchcock to rip off himself
Wassup Rockers – Larry Clark, no one asked to see Kids: Latino Stizz
Dave Chappelle’s Block Party – the finest black movie made by a Frenchmen, EVER
An Inconvenient Truth – had Gore won back in the ’00 would GWBush have starred in that long rumored Alfred E Newman biopic?
Invincible – the only thing missing from this Disney flick was Air Bud
John Tucker Must Die – and the screenwriters too, although Arielle Kebbel is the new Kibbles & Tits!
Hard Candy – no Ellen Page in tight X-Men leather, so how good could it really be?
Mission: Impossible III – the best of the 3… which doesn’t really say much
Idlewild – more like Snooze A While
A Prairie Home Companion – I think Altman died watching this movie
Keeping Up with the Steins – probably the wurstest Bar Mitzvah I never attended
Who Killed the Electric Car? – Who cares?
Clerks 2 – when will America or the Weinstein Bros wake up and realize that Kevin Smith blows donkey goats?
Nacho Libre – Jared Hess is the next Wes Anderson Kevin Smith
until next thyme the balcony is clothed…
