Chapter Lips
15. Jan, 2010 
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The Book of Eli
Better Deso-Late Than Never?
Trailers & Mo | Official Website
The sky has fallen, and so has civilization. A man takes to the road, heading anywhere but here, in search of kind man mankind, while also being one of the sole preservers of it. Stop us if you’ve heard this one before. Hactually don’t, cause you have, moist recently with the munch better Viggo Mortensen traveled Road, but that didn’t stop The Hughes Bros from heading down the same beaten path with their Book of Eli, a flick more concerned with knife-wielding gunplay, than exploring humanity in inhumane circumstances. The smarter ones of this genre usually try to go there, but that doesn’t mean for a second that the Hughes’ Sergio Leone tinged Children of Men knock-off (the rowboat scene made us cringe with déjà vu) aint entertaining & purty to look it, cause tis is, it’s juss not as deep as it’s necessarily trying to dig. Can you dig?
The man on the westward walk be Denzel Washington (nice to see him at work with the Bros), and nothing will stand in his way, not even an overly hammy Gary Oldman, channeling his Léon: The Professional jerkassedness persona or a slightly out of place Mila Kunis, to wherever he’s going and why he’s headed there. The motives (and result) we aint allowed to divulge, but you can probably guess that it has something to do with a book (and not juss any book!), Eli, and the the. When Eli reveals its reveal, it turns out to be about as shocking as Heidi Montag’s daily plastic surgery itinerary. A repeated viewing with the prior knowledge of said reveal won’t likely produce any dividends (like it did with The Village, which went from Village idiocy to a Village Pantry, overstocked with deliciousness), and that’s a true testament of how half-baked this Book of revelations reads
A Ray of Hope: we’re huge fans of the huge Ray Stevenson (he plays one of Oldman’s right-hand men), and yous probably are too if you ever saw HBO’s brilliant, but canceled Rome. well there’s good news out there that apparently even we somehow missed… a Rome MOVIE is in the werks!!!
Verdictgo: Sum Merit But No Stinkin Badges
Eli opens today at a theater near jews, where the not so gr8, but not as awful as everyone’s making it out to be Lovely Bones finally rolls out
and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…
