The Lowell Mather LP

Don McKay
Putting The ‘No’ In Noir
Official Website | Trailers & Mo

Thomas Haden Church IS Don McKay IN Don McKay, the movie that wants to be 9 kinds of movies, but has enuff trouble trying to pull off being juss one movie.  Nice try Jake Goldberger, and poor THChurch (this guy is comedy gold, and yet no one has taken advantage of that post-Sideways), but what in the heck was all this and that about?  Yer plot be: Donnie McKay is a lonely janitor, brought back to his hometown, which he ran away from after some bad stuffs that happened ages ago, by his high school sweetheart Elisabeth Shue (still want her to be our babysitter!), who may or may not be dying, and when her jealous doctor (James Rebhorn) attacks Don and Don attacks back and kills him, Don plays hide, while Shue and her nurse (a plucky Melissa Leo) play seek, but all is not what it seems, but nothing that seems is what all, and what????  Stuff happens, M. Emmet Walsh drives a cab (but doesn’t use the whole fist), Keith David is here too and is not David Keith, but he’s not really here much at all, and he has some sorta jukebox with a mind of its own and this script has a mind of its own, and then the long lost Pruitt Taylor Vince pops in, and this movie poops out and huhhhh?  Never finding its stride, a tone or much of anything, Don McKay is one little mess, with a movie somewhere buried inside, but don’t bother picking up the shovel

The Eyes Have It: wees was always wondering what the dealio was with Pruitt Taylor Vince‘s eyes was was, and spanks to wiki-poodia, wees has gots an answer, pathologic nystagmus!!!

Verdictgo: it’s not the wurst movie we’ve ever seen, but it’s not a movie so Slit Yer Eyes Out Repoopulous

Donnie opens today in NY/LA & Mass(?) only, and elsewhere elsewhen

+ now available on DVD…

Afghan Star
Throw Me The Idol, I’ll Throw You The Whip
Official Website | Trailers & Mo

Everything we’ve ever learned about modern Afghani life we learned by watching Havana Marking‘s Afghan Star.  There’s something really wrong with that statement, but lessthenone, it’s true.  The doc follows four contestants in the nation’s version of American Idol, and as one would expect, the differences are glaring.  We have red and blue states here, but in their neck of the woods, there are more divisions amongst the populace than there are divisions in the NFL.  TV was banned under Taliban rule, so the show itself, put together by people who really don’t know much about putting together a TV show, is an act of freedom.  Even the voting for contestants is no novelty, as it’s actually one of the first bits of democracy these citizens have ever tasted.  While there’s plenty of interesting stuffs found within (it aint easy being a woman in this country!!), after about 30 minutes of watching this, you’ll quickly get the gist, and yer left with about an hour to sit through.  Still, it’s worth a look if you want a lil info-tainment, amongst all the American garbage yer already sitting through

and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…