The Secret Life of The American Teenager’s Comatose Mom
30. Nov, 2011 
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The Descendants
Hawaiian Punch Drunk Love
Official Website |Â Trailers & Mo
R | 115 min
It’s an Alexander Payne movie, so cue the anger, the yelling and some yokel dolted side players, but it’s in Hawaii, so life’s a breeze, right??? It’s not (we mentioned it was an Al Payne movie, right?), and now it’s George Clooney‘s turn to play a Payned middle-aged moper (please lord, don’t give him an acting Oscar), and mope he mos certainly does at the bedside of his comatose wife, but he’s trying to keep up appearances for his two daughters (Shailene Woodley and Amara Miller) that he doesn’t really no how to care for, and then to make Alexander Payne movie matters worse, Clooney finds out that his wife was cheating on him with Matthew Lillard (we never forgot you!!) and he had no clue, and he’s now all kinds of conflicted (how can you be mad at a woman in a coma!!)!!  Feelings will be searched, bonds will be bonded, Hawaiian shirts will be worn and epiphanies will be reached, like how heritage sometimes trumps money!!  Plus we get to rock out to Hawaiian music with the likes of Rob Huebel, Beau Bridges, Robert Forster, Judy Greer and Michael Ontkean!!  Plus we get handed this really dumbed up kid (Nick Krause) who serves no real purpose besides being a punching bag for one scene, but his face should have been punched in every scene, but really,  he shouldn’t have been in a single scene.  So what happens?  Stuff and it’s fine and good and things and all, but it’s like a hang 7 instead of a 10
moral of the story:  think hanging a 7 instead of a 10 explains it all.  and Clooney schmooney, but Lillard is ill-yard, yo!
Never Change:
Verdictgo:Â Jeepers Worth A Peepers
The Descendants is currently breaking waves in limited release
and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…
