Ford, Have Your Directed A Movie Lately?
08. Dec, 2016 
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Nocturnal Animals
Whatturnal Whatttttttttt????
Official Site| Trailer & Mo
R | 116 min
If David Lynch had his name attached to whatever Nocturnal Animals is, then we’d all be saying – woah – this David Lynch movie is pretty slick!
But it’s a Tom Ford movie.  And what does that mean?  We only have one movie to compare it against – his debut, A Single Man, a movie I apparently liked a lot, but the only thing I can remember about that movie were those Michael Caine 60s glasses that Colin Firth wore
And what will I remember about Tom Ford’s second movie?  I dunno, it’s a book within a movie, and reality and fiction are blurred, or something?  Or that Amy Adams is dolled up like an anorexic sexy raccoon? Jake Gyllenhaal still has crazy eyes, but they’re not crazily as used or as good as they were peeping in Nightcrawler (the movie you should see in lieu of Animals)?  There’s a bunch of really really really REALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLY obese naked women dancing in the opening credits?  Michael Shannon looking like the Marlboro Man?  Aaron Taylor-Johnson sounding like he’s trying out a Texas twang for the first time ever as an actor?  Isla Fisher is sorta in it?  Armie Hammer is also sorta in it??  OR THAT EVERYONE IN THE MOVIE (besides Isla Fisher) HAS BLUE EYES???? Â
I dunno, there’s something to this movie, but I can’t put my finger on it, and the ending was an open ended ending, and while I sometimes like things left open ended, this was a movie that needed a definitive ending.  The end! (for me and this movie!)
Verdictgo: Sum Merit But No Stinkin Badges
Animals needs to be tamed – at a theater near jews and white nationalists
and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…
