wait, they making a Bates Motel TV show with Bud Cort, Lori Petty and Jason Bateman???? 

oh wait, they already did and it was totes bad idea jeans, and beyond totes bad reality jeans too!!!

but wait, they’re doing a Bates Motel TV show again?  yeah, but the premise isn’t stoopid or involve Bud Cort or Lori Petty (no disrespect).  it’s about young fidgety Norman Bates and his domineering hot mother moving to a new town and owning a… MOTEL!!!!!!!!!!

wait, isn’t that what Psycho IV with Henry Thomas is was????

kinda, but that movie was made for cable and co-starred female Bill Cosby, so you know it mostly kinda sucks

look, we love Psycho.  it’s in a five-way tie for 2nd greatest film ever (along with Kane, Clockwork, Zodiac and Trainspotting… It’s A Wonderful Life is #1).  we’ve seen all 4 Psycho movies (#2 is actually pretty good!).  we even stayed awake during that dreck where Tony Hopkins was Batman’s Penguin cause it sorta had something to do with Psycho.  we ever read a book about Janet Leigh’s shower body double.  we’d even read a book about the actual shower, if one was written

Psycho is much bigger than one movie or even 4 of them and a failed TV show and a zillion other things.  Psycho‘s a boogeyman we never want to let go of.  we keep going back to the Bates home and that motel and try to figure out why?  and how?  Why Norman?  and how did you get this way?  and why?  and how???

well, we’ve seen the pilot episode of A&E’s new series – Bates Motel, and we never want to check out.  yep, this show gets it (right).  and it’s not cheesy, and there’s no Bud Cort or female Bill Cosby.  maybe the best thing to happen to the franchise was for Anthony Perkins to pass away.  Old Norman Bates has no legs.  But young Norman Bates????  Yes, that’s what we want to see.  Doing stuff with and to his mom, in that house, with that motel at the bottom of it.  But wait, doesn’t this TV show take place in modern times??????  EEEEEEKKK, it does.  But guess what – we quickly got over it, so, so can you, so!  why?  cause this show’s killer and we hope it remains so.  plus Freddie Highmore as young Bates is like Vanessa Hudgens in Spring Breakers = throw away your childish old movie garbage ideas about him and strap on some adult stuff that’s edgy and awesome!!!!!  Oh, and Vera Farmiga as Mama Bates is perfect, cause her eyes have always creeped us out, and now she’s playing a creepy mother of the creepiest character of (PERHAPS) all time

dude, book a room, NOW

+ this girl has mad potential hotness.  hopefully she bones Norman with that thing still in her nose!!

Bates Motel

The TV SHOW!?!?!?

(Psycho – everything except the Bates Motel) + (Harold – Maude) + Lori Petty in a chicken suit + Teen Wolf Too era Jason Bateman + awful writing +1987 = failed NBC pilot turned TV movie [watch in 10 parts]