Snowden
Villians, Heroes, Ones & Zeroes
Official Site | Trailer & Mo
R | 134 min

Edward Snowden and his story must be told, as many times as possible.  It has been told thru the news, endlessly, and then again, personally, in the vital doc Citizenfour, and now Oliver Stone takes his crack, and you’d think it would be all kinds of crackpot-ted, but it’s actually crackerjack!

In fact – Stone’s Snowden is his best film since 1995’s Nixon!  Woah, that’s a long-ass time ago, and yeah, he’s kinda made nuttin but crap since then (although I thighly recommend his TV show ‘The Untold History of the United States‘), but maybe Ollie needed to circle the wagons before he could find himself again – railing against the system, while telling a good story

When watching Stone’s post Nixon output, I kept saying to myself – these don’t feel or look like Oliver Stone films.  They look like sh!t and they feel like a$$.  Maybe Ollie’s done with the 60s and 70s, but we weren’t done with Ollie’s 60s and 70s, but Snowden shows that in the 10s, and with the 1s and 0s, he can make a modern Oliver Stone movie that works, and one that we can be at peace with… while it’s at war, with the world!

As for the movie? Joseph Gordon-Levitt IS Snowden.  If you’ve seen Citizenfour (and you should), you’ll think that G-Levitt nailed it as Snowden.  And Shailene Woodley as his love interest?  She makes things lovely, and interesting, adding well needed humanizing to Snowden’s story, which I didn’t really expect from Stone, or from a spy story that mainly involves keyboards and monitors!

And the rest of the cast?  Outside of Nicolas Cage‘s oddly restrained role as a burned out g-man, Melissa Leo (nice and quiet), Zachary Quinto (forever intense with those eyebrows), Tom Wilkinson (nice Scottish accent!), Scott Eastwood (so glad we’ll have someone that looks like Clint for decades to come), Timothy Olyphant (always a jerk), Ben Schnetzer (keep an eye on this guy), Keith Stanfield (another one to watch), and Rhys Ifans (always a prick, always amazing) all help to shine a much needed light on the darkness that lies behind keeping our enemies at bay

Plus, most people aint gonna see a documentary, so it’s important that thee fictionalized movie gets it right, cause more people will see it, and this movie gets it right, and more people need to see it!

Verdictgo: Breast In Show

Snowden snowDOES it right, currently at a theater near jews

and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…

The Flowqueens of ‘14.5

1) Jodorowsky’s Dune

The greatest doc ever made about the greatest film never made, EVER!!  So many ‘what if?‘s AND ‘what the f#$k??!!!‘s to shake your head at

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2) Whiplash

Dude, WHIPLASHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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2.5) The Trip to Italy

Lightening strikes twice as Steve Coogan and Rob Brydon take their thick shtick to Italy.  Hilarity ensues at every blip on the map.  AMORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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3) The Babadook

Are the things going bump in the night all in their heads?  Too late, they are now in our heads too!  BABA-DOOK DOOOK DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOK!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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4) Mr Turner

Literally watching paint dry – and it’s amazing!!!

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5) Foxcatcher

Carell’s nose, Ruffalo’s beard and hairline + Tatum’s sad face = Pinned-trest-ed!!!

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6) Nightcrawler

Jake Gynenhehahehallllll is watching you.   Watch him back

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7) The LEGO® Movie

Toys with our emotions in the best way possible.  It also happens to be funniest Will Ferrell flick in half a decade

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8) Inherent Vice

Katherine Waterston continues her ‘brave’ (read – ‘nude’) work in cinema

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9) Dawn of The Planet of The Apes

Going ape-sh!t, again

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10) Citizenfour

The year’s best thriller is not only based on a true story – it is THE truest true story!

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11) The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies

Unibrowser Yowzers!!

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12) Boyhood

Seamless production and process like none other make up for a somewhat lacking narrative.  Bring on Manhood!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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13) The Double

Every movie needs Jesse Eisenberg.  So why not have two Jesse Eisenbergs???

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14) Step Up All In

If you’re not in, you are OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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and now for the…

Honor Blackmanable Mentions

The Fault In Our Stars / Get On Up / Interstellar / Jersey Boys / Lucy / Palo Alto / X-Men: Days of Future Past

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our annual anal movie awards – The Thighsmans – drops the week of the Oscars 

until then, here’s the bestest films of yesterhere

2013
2012
2011
2010
2009
2008
2007
2006
2005
2004
2003
& 2002

Citizenfour
The Patriot Act
Official Website | Trailers & Mo
R | 114 min

You know that one photo of Edward Snowden, right?

The info Snowden divulged is the story, but who Snowden is, why he did what he did, and what he had to do next is juss as important as the info itself. I mean, why not tell a story from all sides? If only the US government believed in such transparency

Verdictgo: Jeepers Mos Def Worth A Peepers

get on all Fours, in limited release today

and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…