Thighs Wide Shut

The Campaign
On The Trail Mixed Bag
Official Website | Trailers & Mo
R | 85 min

With The Campaign, Jay Roach has now made as many average political movies (Recount + that Sarah Palin one) as he has Austin Powerses (when one AP was enuff).  The rest of his resume consists of 2 up and down/frown Focker flicks, Mystery, Alaska, the mostly lacking Dinner for Schmucks, and something called Zoo Radio.  Lets just say that Mel Brooks isn’t losing any sleep over this oeuvre.  But what are we saying?  We haven’t said anything!  But what we’re gonna say is that Jay Roach makes unmemorable films that contain very memorable laughs.  The Campaign?  Forgettable, but it certainly had its [funny] moments.  Is that enuff?  Sure, why not

Pit Will Ferrell against Zach Galifianakis in a single movie and dare it to be unfunny.  WE DARE YOU!!!!!!  They both play two inept dudes running for some North Carolina congressional seat.  Their ‘heated’ race and ‘nail-bitting’ election are udderly uninteresting, when we guess they could have been, but the hi-jinks Will & Zach toss our way guarantee to make The Campaign a worthwhile staple of cable TV airings in the decade to come.  Is that enuff? Sure, why not

But we expect betterbester of our comedies.  The satire could have been more biting, instead juss being nibbly.  And when you have a campaign staff consisting of such heavies as John Lithgow, Dan Aykroyd and Brian Cox, but have them do nothing but fake smile and shake hands, you know that bester is possible.  Dylan McDermott, as a stealthy taskmaster, and Karen Maruyama, as an antebellum sounding maid, boost the approval ratings a bit, but the whole affair is a tight race that’s almost too close to call, if it’s worth your time or not.  Is that enuff? Maybe not, but you could always juss re-watch Election instead

InnHERspace: Katherine LaNasa is out of this orbit hot

so much so that she’s been married to Dennis Hopper AND French Stewart, and now is engaged to Grant Show

Verdictgo: loooooooooooooow end Jeepers Worth A Peepers

The Campaign swings into a state near jews

and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…

Rise of the Planet of the Apes
The Found Link
Official Website | Trailers & Mo
PG-13 | 105 min

Rise of the Planet of the Apes is by far the scariest of all the 7 Apes movie (Tim Burton’s mistake was scary for a different reason), and maybe even the third best ever, after the orginal and Escape from the Planet of the Apes.  YES!!!!!  This is how a prequel should be done – add to the series (it’s like Conquest, but done betterer), not take away from it (Hannibal Rising) or add nothing new (X-Men: First Class) or juss be plain insulting (Star Wars, cough, cough)

The storyline wasn’t overly complicated, and the direction (by Rupert Wyatt) was good enough, but what makes this Apes rise high is the quality caliber of acting put on display, by the humans (James Franco, John Lithgow, and from the little that Freida Pinto, David Oyelowo, Brian Cox and Tom Felton get to do) and by the humans who were motion captured to pretty close perfection as CGI chimps (Andy Serkis, the king of kong and all other creatures who aren’t really there).  If you watch the originals, they feel kinda cheesy, and we’re not just talking about the ape masks.  When you watch this one, cheese is nowhere to be found

We dug Apes cause we could believe the apes.  Not their cause (although animal cruelty does suck though, right Nim?), but that they were really apes, aping up more feelings than juss wanting a banana.  CGI shiz is still not eggzactly where it needs to be (neither is the internet, so nobody’s perfect… yet), but we’ll take this Planet‘s fake terrain over most other CGI clusterfudges of the past few years

All hail Caesar, and hopefully for many movies to come!

The GrApe Escape: there’s no denying how yumcredbile the original Apes is, but Escape from the Planet of the Apes may be the most fun.  watch why!

Verdictgo: Jeepers Mos Worth A Peepers

Apes is pre-cool at a theater near jews

and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…