Tag Archives: Tate Taylor

Biopicky

Get On Up
Soul Brother # Won
Official Website | Trailers & Mo
PG-13 | 138 min

get on up

I know who James Brown is. Lucky to have seen him in concert, TWICE! Perhaps today’s kids aren’t all up on their Godfather of Soul knowledge – and hence the need for dem to GET ON UP on it, as suggested by the talking head testimonial trailer singing his singing praises, that’s been used more as this biopic’s trailer than its own actual trailer. Well, regardless if you know JB or don’t, your probably won’t learn much about him in Tate Taylor‘s (The Help) lively, but information-free Get On Up

Sure, the film starts off with a bang – focusing on his infamous run-in/away from the law, and sizzles the ears til its finish – with the actual recorded versions of Brown’s vocals and music pumpin loud, but by the end, the picture isn’t really complete. I was saying to myself, I know James Brown, but I don’t know anymore than I knew before I saw this here film. And tsk tsk for no nods to his time with The Blue Brothers (even if Dan Aykroyd is in the movie), or ‘Living In America’ for Rocky IV or being wasted on TV!!!

But but but but but, you wanna know what? Sure, the story is thin, but his music is THICK, and JB’s shtick shines on, in the soulful shoes of Chadwick Boseman. Boseman displayed quiet brilliance as Jackie Robinson in last year’s 42, and exudes beyond exudtion exuding in Get On Up (even if his JB accent sorta sounds like Casey Affleck and his annoying voice). The movie IS his performance (+ some excellent make-up work), and Boseman not only plays the man, he IS the MAN. He should play every prominent African-American figure of all thymes. They should remake Ray and see what he can do with it. Or they should make a movie where Jamie Foxxxx’s Ray Charles teams up with Boseman’s Brown to fight all the Marvel characters!!!

The supporting players are gifted actors – Nelsan Ellis, Viola Davis, Octavia Spencer – but they aint the MAN like Boseman is, like James Brown is, like Boseman as Brown is is

Funk don’t quit, even if the funk is uninformative

Jersey Boys
Oh What A Blight!
Official Website | Trailers & Mo
R | 134 min

jersey boys

There’s nothing more cheesy than the Jersey Boys musical. That is until I encountered the movie version of the musical, directed by the ‘musical’ Clint Eastwood, which reveals JUSS how cheesy the musical is, when you add in close-ups and sets and things and stuff

You either know who Frankie Valli and The Four Seasons are or you don’t. If you don’t, you probably won’t care to see how they came together and overcame ‘adversity’ to make such sweet sweet music. You actually don’t need to know their story, since there isn’t much of one (unlike the life of James Brown), but the music is juss so darn good. I mean, my wife and I saw Frankie months back (HE’S STILL GOT IT!!!!), and the first dance at our wedding was to ‘Can’t Take My Eyes Off You’

When I first saw this movie, I was repelled and repulsed at juss how cheesy it was. Then weeks passed and I couldn’t stop thinking how great the movie was because it WAS ultra-cheesy. I was like, you juss to good to be true, can’t take my MIND OFF OF YOU AND YOUR OOOOOZY CHEESE!!!

Oh Gyp DeCarlo. Oh Gyp. Oh Gyp. OH GYP!!!! Who Gyp? He’s some gangster guy played by Christopher Walken, who solves everyone’s problems, like the ‘problems’ the Four Seasons encounter. These problems? That the band’s founder Tommy DeVito is bad with money, and that the guy who plays him – Vincent Piazza – may be bad at acting. Or maybe Tommy DeVito IS an actual walking Italian-Jersey stereotype and Vincent Piazza is playing him perfectly. But who cares, cause the whole thing’s cheesy, so Jimmy, give me a pizza wit NUTTIN


Verdictgo: both Jeepers Worth A Creepers

The BoysGet On Up at a theater near jews

and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…

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The Mississippi Fried Movie

The Help
Maid In America
Official Website | Trailers & Mo
PG-13 | 137 min

We’re not super big on southern styled movies revolving around sassy women doing sassy things in sassypants (never have seen Steel Magnolias, Driving Miss Daisy, or Green Fried Tomatoes), but we do like us some sappy movies that make us cry and semi-revolve around pie and fried chicken.  The Help is just such a movie, but this one’s got a message, about dicey race relations or something, but with a hope for a better tomorrow, or something!!!  And guess what, WE LOVED IT TO TEARS!!!!!!!!!  NOW FEED US SOME FRIED CHICKEN, NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Based on the runaway bestseller of the same name by Kathryn Stockett (that we haven’t read a word of, snatchurally), no-name writer/director Tate Taylor takes the story about the stories of two black maids (stoically solid, and Oscar-worthy Viola Davis, and an outrageously enraged Octavia Spencer) and the one white woman (not even fugly wigs can make Emma Stone un-hot/awesome) ‘brave’ enuff to tell their stories, and makes all these stories about stories of stories well worth telling and watching… even if they never happened, and even if some have accused the movie of candy-coloring & white-washing elements of the Civil Rights era.  So what if Skeeter (Emma Stone’s stoopid character’s name) is the white vehicle for these oppressed black women to be courageous and let them have their say?  It’s a freakin movie, and one, FOR ONCE, that’s appealing to both white AND black audiences!!!  Name another movie that is… that isn’t a crummy Eddie Murphy movie!!!????

Maybe The Help is lame, and we’re juss over-loving it cause it’s a summer Hollywood movie without any superheroes, and we’re beyond sick of summer superheroes.  Or maybe it’s not lame cause The Help has super heroes, but the only special powers they use are kindness, caring and compassion!!!!  (this review is starting to sound as sappy as the movie is, but WHO CARES!????).  Maybe The Help works cause Julia Roberts isn’t in it?  Maybe cause it juss looks great and feels right?  Maybe cause peeps like Bryce Dallas Howard, Jessica Chastain, Allison Janney, Cicely Tyson and Sissy Spacek are supporting acting the sh#t outta it?????  Maybe the movie is juss a great fracking movie, with tenderness, laughter and has pie AND fried chicken in every 5th scene????? MAYBE!!!

Maybe we need help, but maybe you need to see The Help

Help Wanted:  here’s someone we’d like to see in a French maid outfit – former James Franco flame

Ahna O’Reilly

Verdictgo: Breast In Show

Help helps itself to a theater near jews tomorrow

and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…

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