I’m never getting around to seeing Fences or Lion, so here’s…

Dwelve Into These Twelve
of 2016

1) Tower

A real life tragic event gets Waking Lifed, and it’s not only scary and horrific, but hopeful AND inspiring!

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2) I Am Not Your Negro

What it’s like to be an African-American in America (when you’re white and have no clue what it’s like).  It raises all sorts of important questions that no one is really asking, or sadly, bothering to answer

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3) Patriots Day

An event I didn’t plan on reliving ended up making me feel proud to be an American… in a time I’m ashamed to be an American

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4) 20th Century Women

It’s like listening to The Talking Heads for the very first time – WOAH!

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5) The Founder

Sometimes it takes some awful in humans to make greatness, and greasiness for us all!

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6) The Light Between Oceans

Perhaps the year’s most overlooked movie that had ‘Oscar bait’ written all over it.  You no longer have to take the bait to something that no longer is baiting you, and it’s time for you to no longer overlook this film!

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7) Bleed For This

if Miles Teller bleeds – I will come!

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8) Embrace of the Serpent

I apparently never reviewed Serpent, but you need to Embrace this film – which puts the ‘lonely’ in ‘coLONELYialism’!

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9) Streit’s: Matzo and the American Dream

All things must pass – even the Lower East Side’s last remaining matzah factory, and with it, a part of Jewish culture and identity in America :( 

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10) Hell or High Water

Why choose when you can have BOTH hell AND high water!!!

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11) Sully

Dude is mad fly!

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12) Raiders!: The Story of the Greatest Fan Film Ever Made

These guys lived out their childhood dreams, in childhood, and finished them in their adulthood!  Fedora hats off forever to these dudes!!

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and now for the…

Honor Blackmanable Mentions

Elstree 1976 / Snowden / Rouge One / Love & Friendship / The Witch / Jackie / La La Land / Toni Erdmann / Jheronimus Bosch, Touched by the Devil / Doctor Strange / the first 2/3rds of Moonlight / Indignation / The Lobster / Me Before You / Bridget Jones’s Baby / My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2

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our annual anal movie awards – The Thighsmans – drops the Friday before the Oscars.  stay pooned!

until then, here’s the bestest films of yesterhere

2015
2014
2013
2012
2011
2010
2009
2008
2007
2006
2005
2004
2003
& 2002

Tower
Rifiling With Rotoscoping
Official Site | Trailer & Mo
Not Rated | 82 min

I do not condone murder, but I cannot help but be fascinated by murderers (and their victims).  If you’ve read this site before, you know that (I’m insane) David Fincher’s Zodiac is my everything (that isn’t fried chicken, the Nationals, or my wife), so a documentary about the 1966 University of Texas Tower Shooting was totally gonna be up my alley, and up my butt – and it totally ended up being so/both!

In 82 measly (un)easy minutes, Keith Maitland‘s Tower lets the victims tell their stories from that day, and beyond.  From historical records and new interviews, Maitland took their testimonial transcripts and recreated the tragedy by rotoscoping actors and pairing it with whatever existing footage exists into a dreamy nightmare documentary that instills fear and thrills, but also inspires hope and peace

Normally the murderer is the one who gets the most attention in any filmed infotainment about murderers, but Charles Whitman’s name barely gets a mention by the time the films wraps, and while I was wondering about the who/what/when/where/how/why about Whitman the entire time, I actually didn’t mind ending up not knowing anything about him at all.  He set the event in motion, but he’s not important

This doc is important

Most folks know little of this event, but hopefully that will no longer be the case if one checks out one the most essential films of 2016!  EAT THAT ALL OTHER 2016 MOVIES!!!

Sadly, history has repeated itself many times since this event, but maybe we can learn from the past mistakes of others.  What a TOWERing achievement that would be

Verdictgo: Breast In Show

Tower is very tall, currently in limited release

and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…