Thighs Wide Shut

+ Who cares if Duke beat MD. That’s what they’re suppose to do… juss like Shelden is suppose to take his nerve tonic!

+ Lohag/Paris

+ The camera LOVES Kristanna Loken’s BOOBS [and who NSFW doesn’t via Superfishies]

+ Yale is punker than you AND Brewster!

+ I’ll probably know 4 bands in the line-up this year, but who’s coming with? First churro is on you, first hand job is on me!!

+ Next Sunday, Skins @ Bears, Pats @ Colts

+ The G is resting

+ Six Feet Under obits… I missed these before, and I miss them 4EVA

+ Trent took a break from being highly gay and highly fabulous to let other gay and fabulous people know how much he wants to hump my leg

+ Chloe, quit giving me boners

+ Well of course the giraffe is gonna lose weight if ya stop feedin it sweets!

+ Sports’ Hottest Significant Other Tournament

+ How did 8-1/2×11 and 8-1/2×14 become the standard paper sizes?

+ Jean-Michel Basquiat’s Rebopper [via Art Monk]

+ 2004 fo sho!

+ Poor Man’s Version

+ Ah, the good ole days [NSFW]

+ Maybe the single greatestestest YTMND thing of balls thyme… and sadly, I actually remember watching this when it was on the TV

They Are ALWAYS The Man Dawg!! [via The Thinker]

and if you visit four houses in yer life, make sure they be Graceland, The Hearst Castle (me hath yet to go), The Winchester MYSTERY House, and Falling Water. Do wright, not Frank Lloyd WRONG!!!

[photo by Flea]

Why bother urling Tastical when we have the REAL Lohag “Nude” Vanity Fair SNAPS right here!!!

French President Jacques Chirac denies a report that he wanted to be casting director of da Da Vinci Code. Good thing he’s waSNOT, cause although I have no issue with his choice of Sophie Marceau [NSFW] as the French bird who may or may not be the direct descendant of the woman banged the man that was part of the immaculate conception and/or the man who had the immaculate reception, there was no effin no way any of us would ever never ever buy our winged ami Astérix as Harvard professor of Religious Symbology Robert Langdon. Stoopid Frenchies and their mustard. They think cause the made some decent movies in the 50s and 60s that they can tell us how to cast OUR crappy box office fiascos!!! Stick to yer Gerard DipinPOO and stuff and frog legs and that joke in Trading Places where that guys punches the line: “Look at that ‘S’ Car Go!”

• Meg, no matter what you do, Jack won’t take you back [via Ms Mod]

• Why would Señor ever touch Mary Poppins? There aint no aliens or Jews involved!

• The Sopranos Season 6 teaser trailer is about as eggciting as watching Tony Soprano watch TV (aka Season 5)

• Who said the gov-mint wasn’t cool? They juss added Fast Times at Ridgemont High, Toy Story, Hoop Dreams, The Rocky Horror Picture Show, Cool Hand Luke, The French Connection, and 19 others to the Library of Congress’ National Film Registry!! Howevski, please don’t confuse 1929’s H20 with 1998’s HBoooO… btw, much belated peace the fudge out to Moustapha Akkad and his daughter, victims or jerkassedness

• A review of the G.I. Joe movie script… sadly, a Shipwreck appearance may have to wait for the sequel: G.I. JOE 2: Brokeback Ocean’s 69

• I guess humping my leg isn’t as memorable as meeting Josh Madden

• Stereogum, king of the ‘Yupsters’?

• Every film going fwd should contain the same plot keywords as La Niña Santa

• Soon to be Super Bowl MVP, Clinton Portis and his many costumes [via Ivan the 20850er]

• Gotta 7’7 friend with a b-day coming up? Bid on Manute Bol’s warmup pants and jersey [via Guns N Rosenthal]

• Pinder is ‘Easy’ and loves soccer + a good slap on der a$$ + actually looks decent when her boobs are covered up!

• It’s CRIMINAL that someone swiped ThighsWideShut in MySpace land [via T Bakes]

• Bestest Cliff Engle sweater that I’m too fat to bid on!!!!

• Can a live person be packed in a shipping crate and mailed?

• Jared Fogel wants to talk dirty to you [via Made of Brawnsteeen]

• Nate, where’s the male camel toe? [via Ceffle]

• The 30 Best Names in College Basketball [via Gorilla Man]

• You don’t have to be a Spanish lingusistical persona to understand what’s goin on here [via Lunar Baby]

• The 100 Most Annoying Things of 2005

• Amazing Alizee [via Seppo]

• And for you unlucky rubber soles sistahs who didn’t receive a HOLIDAUKKAH Greeting Card from 1st Family of Thighs, I wanna show ya what you missed…

Pee es II – Me and a small shady crew are headed to Bloomington, IN this weekend. If you find me like Waldo (or Wally if yer a personage of Britishness) I’ll buy you a cookie or THINGS!!!

OH SNAP!

CRAPPLE
& SUX
Y?

Well how else could one describe the
double-donged peace the fork outting of

Fred The Baker

who when asked if he had a favorite donut flavor, responded:
‘They’re all my children – I love them equally.‘

AND

That Guy
From Those Movies!!

who totally wanted to bang Beth

Further reading: Where Are They Now? Fred The Donut Guy

• What do JK Rowling in Dough, the Gorillaz, and the Prius all have in common? The ghost of Henson present loves em all!!

• You know this world blows when Cody Lohan is hottier than her slag of a sistah

• Wondering what to get yer straight edge pal this Hanukkah? How bout the 10 more shows that juss became available in the Fugazi Live CD Series

• I guess we don’t need to ask Jeeves where Señor got the name for his Amblin Entertainment co

• WBFF-45, where BFFs all get together and watch poopy programs

• TWS.org, yer #4 result when intersleuthing for ‘uninstall photoshop’… are the nia peoples trying to tell me sum-tang?

• The 50 Greatest Gadgets of the Past 50 Years [via UMC]

• TSG’s Top 15 Mugshots of the Year

• Celebs in Panto + Craziest Quotes Of 2005

• No chaser needed with THIS SHOT [vid via Joe E Tar Tar Heel]

• The Belly videos

• The Beerbelly

• Yer muss click of the day: Jacko’s Moonwalker & The 8-Bit Posse vs the Muscle Man In Space CRAZYnessness!! [via Retrobestness]

• And although I am true to my bug bite boobed queen, KK the V, by sticking my tab into her slot every 10 minutes, while drinking Tab and playing the nickel slots, I can’t help but being rung by a Belle for the 1st time since Albert came to Baltimore