The 2017 Thighsmans
we named the breastest movies of the beastest of the 2017
and now, for the only awards that matter…
Fourteenthial Anal Thighs Wide Movie Awards
aka
THE THIGHSMANS!!!
_
Thing In A Movie That Pissed Me Off More Than Urinating In and/or On My Own Pants
trying to make Rose from Star Wars
The Last Jedi a thing
_
Second Thing In A Movie That Pissed Me Off More Than Urinating In and/or On My Own Pants AND That Wasn’t Leia Flying In Space
the environmental message of freeing the DUMBo animals in Last Jedi
_
The 8th Annual Greta Grrr Wig Recipient of The You Think You’re An Actress And Maybe You Are But You Annoy The Living Bejesus Out Of Me Every Time I See You On Screen And I Want You Gone So Please Stop Acting Award
go away
Lily James & her teef
_
The Samuel L Jackson
Never Met A Script
He Didn’t Like
Man of The Year
Â
Dan Stevens
who had SEVEN flix released in 2017!!
_Â
Gifs of the Gawds
anything Rihanna was doing in Valerian
_
Begging For More Begbie
there is nothing better than Begbie, the best part of Trainspotting 2
so forget about making a 3rd one and just make a stand alone Begbie movie please
_
Bob’s Big Girls (& Boys)
aka
The 2017 Bobbies!
these bobbies are darin!
_Â
The KFC Finger Stickin’ Goodness Goodie Three Shoes Award
aka – these ladies be DAMN fine award!!
Eiza González
 &Â
Anjela Nedyalkova
 &Â
Hot Aunt May
 &Â
Gosling’s sister’s rack
 &Â
 Salacious B Crumb sitting on a toilet, reading Playboy
_
Eyes Wide Open For Bidness 9ever
aka Bestest Eyes
Ana de ArmasÂ
_
FOAM Alone!
aka hottest NON-human part of any movie
the foam from Dunkirk
_
Hairing Is Caring AND Sexy
Come for the tennis, and then literally COME watching this hairdressing scene!!!
 _
Würstest BESTEST Date Movie/Witherspoonfest
of 2017
I can’t believe I typed this
Home Again
_
Best Boys On The Side Player
THIS GUY!!!!
 from I, Tonya
_
Songs That Execute Better Than Norman Mailer Does As Norman Bates
The Jon Spencer Blues Explosion – ‘Bellbottoms’ in Baby Driver (somehow I forgot this song existed)
hologram Elvis in Blade Runner 2049
Bowie’s In Space
_
Trailers Worth Tractoring
(in endless memory of Robert ‘Tractor’ Traylor)
Â
Blade Runner 2049Â /Â Baby Driver
Atomic Blonde / ItÂ
_
Poster Her! Poster We! Poster Haste!
_
Unintentional Porn To Be Wild Titles
It Comes at Night / Marrowbone /Â The Girl with All the Gifts /Â All Nighter /Â Captain Underpants: The First Epic Movie /Â The Nut Job 2: Nutty by Nature
_
Fenella Woolgar
Bestest Names Award
Ninja N. Devoe
Flint Beverage
&
David Buttolph
_
Don’t You Forget About Me/These Forgetmenot Bon Mots
i made all these Kao Kan gifs for you
this logo
Why I Love David Fincher’s Zodiac
where leia’s hair buns
were inspired from
Tom Selleck as Indiana Jones and Sean Young as Marion Ravenwood!!!!!!!!
Eworks on Ice!
_
Movies To Look For In The ‘018
Â
Four Billboards Outside of Branson, Missouri
Boss Toddler
DiPs
Hello Robin Christopher
The Man Who Invented Hanukkah
Rebel in the Pumpernickel
17 Fast, 17 Furious
_
In Memoriam
too many great names to name, so we’ll just leave it like this
_
don’t forget to peep out our  ’16,  ’15, ’14, ’13, ’12, ’11, ’10, ’09, ’08, ’07, ’06, ’05, ’04, ’03, and ’02 awards!!Â
until next thyme the balcony is clothed…