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Tuesday, April 27
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One day my beard will
look as cool as this |
I'm usually an opening weakend kinda guy, but I was mos def not going to be camping out for Kill Bill: Volume 2 after the stinkbomb that was Volume 1 (Lucy Liu, no plot, pointless violence, and Lucy Liu). So mees finally stepped away from the computer for 3+ hours and got my a$$ to the theater to see the second round. And to me sir prize, Volume 2 was not only not awful, but 2,143,823,714,897,328 times better than the first one. It's not on par Q's Plop Friction or even Reservoir Diz-awgs, but what can be? It's like Orson Welles and the Citizen Kane syndrome; everything after that is bound to not be as good. I mean one of Orson's last credits was providing the voice of Unicron in Transformers: The Movie! Anywho, here are the highlights & lowlights:
- The revenge plot is still kinda straight fwd and borrrring, but FINALLY, we got the background stories on the characters. I actually cared for them instead of hoping they all would die.
- It seems the only one who can get great performances out of Michael Madsen is Tarantino. I was a lil pissed off that he wasn't drinking a soda out of a straw and tearing a guy's ear off, but you can't win them all.
- The RZA's score is um-f-in-credible. There was some Mobyesque mash up of the Zombie's killer tune, "She's Not There".
- Daryl Hannah is crazy hot again!!! Probably cause she went on MTV's I Want A Famous Face and told em to maker her over, Romijn-formerly-Stamos style.
- Less action and more talking is actually a good thing.
- We finally learn the Bride's name. Now that I know, I'm wondering why they fudge they bleeped it out in the first place. It doesn't add much to the story. Whatevs.
- Why cast a little girl who can't act, if you can get Dakota Fanning.
- The credits weren't as pretentious as Vol 1's. I would have cut my eyes out if I saw "The Fourth.2 Film by Quentin Tarantino" on the screen.
- With this to his credit, Samuel L. Jackson has now appeared in more movies than Mc Donalds has served people.
- David Carradine has the coolest voice ever. He can sell me shit in a bag if he wanted to. | | 
Thanks GAD there wasn't
two of these shit stains!! |
Final point: Kill Bill Volumes 1 & 2 is to movies as Guns N' Roses' Use Your Illusion I & II is to music. Why overdue it with two, when one would suffice? Cut the crap and create one masterpiece. I mean, did the world really need two versions of "Don't Cry"? Btw, worst/best G N' R song ever, "Garden of Eden"
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