|
|
Tuesday, November 10
2012
This Is The Yawning of The Age of Egregiousness
Trailers & Mo | Official Website
However awful you think Roland Emmerich's 2012 will be, multiple it times awful, then multiple it times boring, then multiple it times predictability, then square root it with obvious ethnic stereotypes (although Hispanics are spared the embarrassment), stir for 158 minutes and pray to Jesus that you can somehow regain that time and money you juss threw down the eau de toilet bowl. If you subtract all of the shock and awful from the trailer, yer left with nuttin but a script that was adapted from the wurstest cliched bits and lines from a collection of the worstest doomsday movie scripts ever written, whose words are wastefully delivered by Lloyd Dobler, a velociraptor, the director of The Station Agent & The Visitor, Danny Glover in whiteface and Woody Harrelson, who plays a really sh%tty version of Woody Harrelson. A tell-tale sign of poopocity in the making is anytime a movie lets Oliver Platt show up to play someone with power. Anyone who knows anything about power or Oliver Platt knows that you don't give Oliver Platt power in a movie or really bad things will happen. And somehow the lovely Thandie Newton and chewable Chiwetel Ejiofor got caught up in this sh%tstorm of running away from earthquakes, tsunamis and volcanoes (at least they weren't running away from air, like in M Nightshammaladingdong's The Unhappening) . We all should take a page out of their book and run away from this disaster as fast as humanly possible
Who Would You Rather:
Alexandre Haussmann and Philippe Haussmann
or
Beatrice Rosen?
Verdictgo: Slit Yer Eyes Out Repoopulous
2012 destroys eyes this Friday at a theater near jews
and until next thyme the balcony is clothed...
|
|
