Thursday, September 30
Moz Sticks?
& 
| Rebel Without A Life
 |
- News that makes my day, besides knowing that I'm watching Mean Girls at lunch, DIGABLE PLANETS TO REUNITE!! [via Catchdubs]
- How on earth does Ali G land those interviews with such big wigs? Much explained here. [via NeueYorkish]
- Speaking of the G to the Ali, I frynally found an update on that Sacha Baron Cohen movie entitled Dinner For Schmucks. I don't even know when it gets released, but I'm already camped outside of the AMC Empire on the NEW 42nd St as I type this!
- Czech out this song/video by Gym Class Heroes. They name drop more indie bands than K-Sir+ & UltraHotStuff combined! [via Shady Harrison]
- Failed Day Fest. Lets pray history doesn't repeat itself.
- Here's everything you wanted to know about forming your own country, but were afraid to ask. I'm forming the Republic of Thighland and as Lord of the Thighs, every Thursday will be hat day and Her Royal Thigness' b-day will be a national holiday.
- So the Lohanster is so hella trashino right now, so lettuce focus our attention back to Hilary Duff for just a moment. Yeah, normally I'd like to stick her in a blender, but peep these pics from Blender.
 |
- Tears for Fears are hitting the road. They make a stop at the Beacon Theater on Rocktober 28th.
- Oasis looking to mcnabb Ringo to guest Starr on their next album.
- I think this sums up how a lot of people feel: Kerry-Haters For Kerry. Anywho, be sure to watch the debates tonight and whip out this bingo card for full debate funnnnness! [1st via Willy Wonkette, 2nd via Fark]
- The NYPress goes list crazy, dropping props to Miss Mod and gettin all sid vicious on Gawker. [coincidently via Miss Mod]
- And New Yawkers, please give a warm welcome yer newest neighbor, Juan Valdez, who's here to kick Starbuck's a$$!!
Wednesday, September 29
I've Been Waiting
For This Moment
For All My Life
Screw You Peter Brokelos &
You Northern Virginiananians With No Real Cities!!
The Shroud of Turin Brakes
 |
- Lohan's hotness seems to be slipping these daze. First there were the highly un-sexy snaps of her in this month's GQ and now we're stuck with this very un-cumcredible cover to her single 'Rumors'. If I were her, I'd cover my face too! But not before taking a bubble bath and touching my, er, uh, um, her boobs.
- A VA private school doled out margaritas to kids instead of limeade. DOH! Some of the kids found the libation 'gross', while other said it made the girls in their class look 'wicked hot'.
- Have you ever banged some poon in Cancun on a Spring Break sexcapade long ago and wanted to be reunited with that special slut? This site was create for sleaze balls sacs like you! [via Made of Brawnsteen]
- Create yer own Lego person. [via Pakulashaker]
- Peace the spork out to Geoffrey Beene counter! You kicked major (bill) (bl)ass!
- Spaceballs II? Why GAWD, WHY??? Re-watch the 1st one and let me know if you still find it funny. [via GoldenFiddlerOnTheRoof]
- European pets will now need a passport when traveling. And Señor Spot, are you bringing any fruits or plants into this country? Arf! You may proceed.
- And happy 34th flippin b-day to Natalie Wood's daughter/Hollywood's flyest three-named actress who has disappeared off the face of the earth: Natasha Gregson Wagner. We miss you sweetits!! If need be, we can squeeze you in on the lesbian Charlie's Angels movie in production.
Grab A Shovel
& Dig Right In
Dig!
Dug Dig!? Yep, Dig! Dug!
View Trailer
This udderly fascinating and engaging documentary peers in at one of mod rock's greatest rivalries that no one even knows eggsists: The Brian Jonestown Massacre vs The Dandy Warhols. Director Ondi Timoner followed each of the bands for seven grueling years, on a shoe-string budget, and had unlimited access to all the partying, fighting, arrests, and the unrelievable music that kept them movin' fwd. The focal point of the doc is on both bands' frontmen, BJM's Anton Newcombe and DW's Courtney Taylor (who's a Bitched @ Swirth candidate with actor Jonathan Rhys-Meyers). At first the two were the breastest of friends (some say BFF), but as the Dandy's star was on the rise to the mainstream, the Brian Jonestown cru refused to leave the underground, paving a way for bitterness and a rivalry that only Anton seemed to care about. And what happened in between is beautifullyistically captured for us to see. Now it's really hard to make a bad documentary, unless of course yer name is Nick Broomfield, but Timoner is pretty f-in ingenious to give us 2 in 1. 2004 has not only been a frantastic year for documentaries, but specifically for musical ones. Metallica's made us sympathize with a band we could care less for, KROQ's Rodney Bingenheimer's made us whimper for a man we had no idea was important, and Dig! reminded us that beyond the record sales and flashy videos, the mostest important thing in music is the music itself and if it's any good. In the cases of The Brian Jonestown Massacre and The Dandy Warhols, the answer is yes, two times over.
Other notes:
- Ex-BJM tambourine man, Joel Gion, is the coolest cat in the entire world. He also has the finest taste in shades.
- Dandy Zia McCabe's breasts are quite hypnotizing. Bovs dem beauties til dawn.
- Lamp-chomp sideburns need a 4th coming
- Ex-BJM bassist, Matt Hollywood should play John Lennon in a movie
- Don't bother buying the BJM's albums, as you can download them all off their website fo free!
- SEE THE FRIGGIN FLICK OR I'LL KICK YOU IN THE HEAD LIKE MY NAME WAS ANTON NEWCOMBE!!
Open Water
I'm Never Leaving Land Again
View Trailer
I never found The Blair Witch Project all that scary. Maybe cause it BLEW DONKEY BALLS, but also cause I couldn't buy into the whole boogey man factor. On the flipsyde, with about the same Bar Mitzvah video budget, we have Open Water. This is a highly realistic, albeit horribly acted, albeit one scene with boobies, and harrowing film about two people left for dead in the middle of the ocean. It also doesn't hurt that it was based off a true story. The entire time, I kept saying to me-self, "Brain, what the fudge would we do in this situation?" But who cares about me, just stay out of the water and see this moovie. And the ending may sirprize you. (OK, they wash up on a shore, become friends with a beach ball, and build a 4 story house out of FedEx boxes... WHOOPS, did I just give it away?)
The Last Shot
They Should Have Given The Script A Few More Shots
View Trailer
Everything was in place for an enjoyable night at the movies: Based on a true story (I'm a sucker for those), Alec Baldwin's producer-hungry FBI agent squaring off with hapless writer/director Matthew Broderick, Calista Flockhart giving us our first Flockhard-on (or should that be Ally McBoner?), Tony F-in Shalhoub (!), and Buck Henry donning a wig that made em look like Gus van Sant. How could this not be supercalifragilelisticexbealadocious? Plain and nipple simple, the laffs were too between far and few and far between. Toni Collette peeing in a bottle? That’s like ditching "I didn't do it" for "Woozle Wuzzle". "That's what passes for entertainment these days?
Alphaville
We Gotta Get Out Of This Place
If It's The Last Thing We Ever Do
Black & White. French. About the future but looks more like the 50s. Sounds like a snoozefest, right? Yep, pretty much. Many hail this Jean-Luc Godard flick as a classic, well, eye moz certainly aint part of this many, mo, or jackshitcrap. It's big on ideas, but there are 847238548657 other futuristic films that relay the same message, and they're not as incomprehensible or in French! Netflix his masterpeace Contempt instead. At least in that one you get to see every inch of Brigitte Bardot's succulent body.
Dug Dig!? Yep, Dig! Dug!
View Trailer
 |
Other notes:
- Ex-BJM tambourine man, Joel Gion, is the coolest cat in the entire world. He also has the finest taste in shades.
- Dandy Zia McCabe's breasts are quite hypnotizing. Bovs dem beauties til dawn.
- Lamp-chomp sideburns need a 4th coming
- Ex-BJM bassist, Matt Hollywood should play John Lennon in a movie
- Don't bother buying the BJM's albums, as you can download them all off their website fo free!
- SEE THE FRIGGIN FLICK OR I'LL KICK YOU IN THE HEAD LIKE MY NAME WAS ANTON NEWCOMBE!!
Open Water
I'm Never Leaving Land Again
View Trailer
 |
The Last Shot
They Should Have Given The Script A Few More Shots
View Trailer
 |
Alphaville
We Gotta Get Out Of This Place
If It's The Last Thing We Ever Do
 |
Tuesday, September 28
The Barbarian Invasions
 |
- Lohan's papa passes the fork out and then gets tossed from Scores. [via A Socialite's Life Cereal]
- Dan The Automattica will be the pimp behind the wheels on Franz Federline's next album.
- What's yer Glam Rock name? From now on, just call me Bobby Shinola.
- Shakyface.com claims they're 'one of the world's STUPIDEST sites!' No argument here.
- Click me for free passes to Hilary Duff's next piece of crud.
- Oddest combination since the McGriddle: Hasidic Reggae. [via Seltzer with an H]
- Wanna punch GW Bush in the face? Now's yer chance! [via One Goode Groove]
- John Lennon worshipers may kill Mark David Chapman if he's released from jail.
- Learn how to fold a shirt, the hard way. [via Biz vs the Newbs]
- Tony Almeida, aka THE F-IN MAN, lives to see another 24 hours.
- Dad Says Principal Duct-Taped Son's Pants [via Guns n' Rosenthal]
- And just wanted to send along some major props de leon to Mr Cewebrity for assembling the most beautiful people in all of the Bloggerati ( Stereoshizzle, Ms Ism, UltraHotness, Karen + Yum, Jess Gawker, Jen Daily Planet, Back in Black Table, Da Real Deal Janelle, and Aaron Auto-Focus) for the NYC premiere of one of the breastest music docs me has ever seen: Dig! (full review forthcuming). The afterparty wasn't too shabby either where we all mixed and jingled with director Ondi Timoner, ex-Brain Jonestown Massacre bosstone Joel Gion, the Rods of Idlewild, and my favoritestic Danish duo, Sharon and Sune Raveonette.
Monday, September 27
Fantastic Fournacation
 |
- The mostest pointless news story rocking the world right now is that Her Royal Thighness will not reveal her political affiliation. And why should she? She's piecing together her run for the White House with Michael Dukakis in '08. Backdafuckup Hillary Clinton and Hilary Duff!!
- Did you catch Mike Wallace's interview with jack-ass at-large Bill O'Reilly on the season premiere of 60 Minutes? It was only 1/2 as umcredible as Andy Rooney's rant about his disgust for people who don't vote.
- Bob Dylan gets all Jewish and shit this past weak end. [via Glennmidiah and the Burrito Posse]
- Download the new U2 song here. You know what they say, if it aint baroque, then don't fix it. [via ProductFudgeShoppeNYC]
- I always thumb thru every single piece of spam I get, but usually I'm not interested in such offers to lower my mortgage, increase my penis size, or a large sum of money with my name on it waiting for me in Nigeria. However, this company caught my eye and I'm thinking of getting a large balloon of The Kid to hang outside of HQ in Thighland, Thailand.
 |
- How are we suppose to take the Moro Islamic Liberation Front seriously, if their acronym is MILF? [via Laing Sack of Shit]
- Larry David's TV wife joins the cast of
- Matt Sharp & Rivers Cuomo's reunion may never see the light of day. And whatever you do, please don't rent the Michael J Fox/Joan Jett mastercheese, Light of Day.
- FraudFrond.com, a site more useless than TWS. However, they did link to these fine sites: Eric Conveys An Emotion and good ole Engrish. [via Seltzer with an H]
- Dame Mary Poppins will never sing again. Whoever that bastage is who botched her throat operation should be forced to watch Princess Diarrheas & Princess Diarrheas 2: Royal Engagement over and over again until his eyes fall out.
- T4. Quadruple BOOOO-urns!!! Like I care if Claire Danes saves us from my-so-called future.
 |
- Everyone contact Wagamama and demand that they bring one to the grand ole USA NOW!
- This is a whole lotta whistling.
- Mailboxes, etc. [via Zach de la Roachclip]
- And here's a charming headline to start yer week off right: Teacher Sends Feces Home With 6-Year-Old
Sunday, September 26
Our Flaming Lips
Cannot Be Sealed
The Fiery Furnaces with White Magic
Bowery Ballroom - September 25
Donny & Marie Osmond. Karen & Richard Carpenter. Eleanor & Matthew Friedberger. Which of these brother-sister musical combos isn't like the other? Let me axe you a butter question, which of these sibling sensations rocked the rizzle roof off the Bowery Ballroom this past Saturday night, in front of yers drooly, the Dog of Landers + 498 other beautifullofit people? I'll give you a hint, it's the duo whose last name sounds like they were the focus of a Capturing The documentary. The Friedbergers are the pimps behind the wheels of one of the mostest uniqueness bands I've heard in a wrong time: The Fiery Furnaces. If you haven't picked up their exotic 2nd album, Blueberry Boat, you've missed out on one of the breastest releases of this year. [Note: The Double Fs are like microwaved tuna, an acquiredtaste listen that won't agree with everyone's palette... especially if you have no taste.]
I was eagerly awaiting to see how their tongue-tying lyrics and whimsical circus-like smorgasbord of sound would translate into a live performance and to my udder delight, they was berry very amazinglyumcredibleisticali (btw, that's the new CrazySexyCool)! Sure, any good 'F' band from Fugazi to Franz Federline can replicate their sound purrfectly on stage, but it takes a certain (alec) geniusness to take yer entire oeuvre, flip it on its head (yes, songs have heads) and re-mix it into a hour + medley of majestic manic madness that left me munching for more!! The Friedbergers, along with their rabid stick-man Andy Knowles and synthesizersoother Toshi Yano, kept the energy level and toe tappinin at such an absolute maximum overdrive, from start to finnish furniture, that no one even dared to mcnabb a second beer or see a man about a horse, or a whore for that matter. The White Stripes may be the breastest fake brother-sister duo in music today, but the Fiery Fs are the ultimate warrior breastestness real bro-sis one-two punch in our known solar system. And I think I'm gonna have to toss aside Ms Lohan cause I'm starting to swoon for Eleanor F... not to be confused with Axel F.
Other notes:
- The White Magic's music and singing seem like they should eggsist in separate bands. And, although their lead singer resembles Sissy Spacek, I'd still like to eat pecan waffles off her body and play hours of Othello with her.
- Couzin Dan-o, who shares the same appetite for destruction of the human stomach as I do, recommended the vodka pizza at Pomodoro for pre-show eats, and after shoving it down my pie hole, I have to highly recommend it too.
- The JMZ subway line has gotta be the mostest worthless in all of NYC.
Further Reading: NYThymes, Pitchspork Media, and Latin Inches
Bowery Ballroom - September 25
Donny & Marie Osmond. Karen & Richard Carpenter. Eleanor & Matthew Friedberger. Which of these brother-sister musical combos isn't like the other? Let me axe you a butter question, which of these sibling sensations rocked the rizzle roof off the Bowery Ballroom this past Saturday night, in front of yers drooly, the Dog of Landers + 498 other beautifullofit people? I'll give you a hint, it's the duo whose last name sounds like they were the focus of a Capturing The documentary. The Friedbergers are the pimps behind the wheels of one of the mostest uniqueness bands I've heard in a wrong time: The Fiery Furnaces. If you haven't picked up their exotic 2nd album, Blueberry Boat, you've missed out on one of the breastest releases of this year. [Note: The Double Fs are like microwaved tuna, an acquired
I was eagerly awaiting to see how their tongue-tying lyrics and whimsical circus-like smorgasbord of sound would translate into a live performance and to my udder delight, they was berry very amazinglyumcredibleisticali (btw, that's the new CrazySexyCool)! Sure, any good 'F' band from Fugazi to Franz Federline can replicate their sound purrfectly on stage, but it takes a certain (alec) geniusness to take yer entire oeuvre, flip it on its head (yes, songs have heads) and re-mix it into a hour + medley of majestic manic madness that left me munching for more!! The Friedbergers, along with their rabid stick-man Andy Knowles and synthesizersoother Toshi Yano, kept the energy level and toe tappinin at such an absolute maximum overdrive, from start to finnish furniture, that no one even dared to mcnabb a second beer or see a man about a horse, or a whore for that matter. The White Stripes may be the breastest fake brother-sister duo in music today, but the Fiery Fs are the ultimate warrior breastestness real bro-sis one-two punch in our known solar system. And I think I'm gonna have to toss aside Ms Lohan cause I'm starting to swoon for Eleanor F... not to be confused with Axel F.
Other notes:
- The White Magic's music and singing seem like they should eggsist in separate bands. And, although their lead singer resembles Sissy Spacek, I'd still like to eat pecan waffles off her body and play hours of Othello with her.
- Couzin Dan-o, who shares the same appetite for destruction of the human stomach as I do, recommended the vodka pizza at Pomodoro for pre-show eats, and after shoving it down my pie hole, I have to highly recommend it too.
- The JMZ subway line has gotta be the mostest worthless in all of NYC.
Further Reading: NYThymes, Pitchspork Media, and Latin Inches
Thighs Wide Open
For Bidness
(Lindsay Lohan's Gentlemen's Quarterly SPREAD)
Click image above for the rest of dem snaps!
Props de leon to Tony Le Tigre for the link love!!
"All right, Mr Master o' Thighs*, I'm ready for my close-up."
* no disrespect to Mr Cecil B DeMille
Saturday, September 25
Seizure Salad
Friday, September 24
Welcome To The TerrorDome Piece
 |
- Dan the Automattica and the Gorillaz gone (marc) splitzville? Too bad his replacement is Danger Mouse. Bring on the next shoe shine, cause ya know its gonna be cool.
- This is more of Stereogumesque than Thighs Wide material, but why not bid on Britney's discarded Cheetos bag. [via Cranberrymer/Defamer]
- And if you thought that was awful, czech out this penis-shaped Nugget.
- Sinbad O'Connor has taken out a full-page ad in a national Irish newspaper pleading for people to leave her alone. That's like telling yer older brother to stop hitting you. They'll end up just doing it more.
- Franz Federline's drummer is apparently too hip to pay for a restaurant check.
- Hilary Muff goes 'ghetto'. How 'retarded', as Her Royal Thighness might say.
- I've heard of milkmen, but breastfeeding men!? This is f-in redonkeydonk!! [via Ms Ism]
- As soon as I own a car, I'm mcnabbing the license plate GOTMILF.
- First Daughter is probably gonna be one the wurstest movies ever. Gawd, I can't wait to see it!
- This is the breast guitar since the keytar.
- Students Punished For Having Stripper Pole In On-Campus Apartment. The word 'punished' should be replaced with 'applauded'.
- Prostitute Squad Sidelined In Guatemalan Soccer Tournament!!!
Thursday, September 23
Horriblelistic Trend Gets Horriblelisticular
LuftWaffles
- Unconfirmed reports say that Lohan may have eaten breakfast this morning.
- Why is there an IHOP on Mannyhattan and NOT one Waffle House? I'm tellin ya, I'm gonna find an investor and we're going to open one in Times Square and make 7 ga-zillion billion dollars. [via Made of Brawnsteeen]
- Rosa Parks is old and losing it and may not be able to testify in her case vs OutKast's record company BMG. However, HeyYa Johnson, Aintathang Buttachickenwing Edwards, and Spread Forme Jenkins may be called to the stand.
- Can anyone peas eggsplain to me why National Museum of the American Indian isn't the National Museum of the Native Americans?
- I'll review Open Water berry soon, but in the mean time, czech out the true story that inspired it.
- That uber-scrum-deli-umptious blondie from the last Bond movie, Rosamund Pike, has just signed on for the Doom movie, which stars De Rock and that dude from LOTR: Two Towers with the crazy-arsed helmet.
- Fun and freedom of speech has officially ended at the Uni of Merryland. "Rock and Roll, Part II" has not only been banned from Terps football games, but now basketball games. Maybe if Duke didn't suck so much kak in the 1st place, this wouldn't even be an issue. [via and all a-polly-gees to Navi the Blue Devil Dog]
- Pitney Bowes is auctioning off autographed envelopes. The person who bidded on Ryan Seacrest's should be flogged in a public square.
- The Shawshank Redemption breast film to not win Breast Picture? Uh, hello, Citizen Kane (or perhaps Coz' pre-Peabs work in Ghost Dad)?
- Warner Brudders delays the release of Ollie Stone's Alexander, claiming it'll help their chances with Mr Oscar. I dunno bout you, but after seeing the trailer, they should start preparing Razzie speeches.
- Cybill Shepherd is gearing up to play Don King. Leslie Shepherd could not be reached for comment.
- Love Ohio State and need a sweater? Bid on this phatty sweater.
- Be the first on yer block to visit MoMA: Revenge of the Sith.
- Do you have a NFL stadium fetish? Click here.
-Eminem M&Ms to fight breast cancer.
- Steeler QB Ben Roethlisberger got em self a website. And thanks gawd the url aint benroethlisberger.com. Cause who would ever remember how to spell that sheetz?
- Dumbestist thing of the week. [via Zach de la Roachclipper]
- Plastered outta yer mind on St Ides? Don't drive a car, ride a horse!
- Go to CVS, buy a stomach and save 4 whole dollars!!
 |
- Rosa Parks is old and losing it and may not be able to testify in her case vs OutKast's record company BMG. However, HeyYa Johnson, Aintathang Buttachickenwing Edwards, and Spread Forme Jenkins may be called to the stand.
- Can anyone peas eggsplain to me why National Museum of the American Indian isn't the National Museum of the Native Americans?
- I'll review Open Water berry soon, but in the mean time, czech out the true story that inspired it.
- That uber-scrum-deli-umptious blondie from the last Bond movie, Rosamund Pike, has just signed on for the Doom movie, which stars De Rock and that dude from LOTR: Two Towers with the crazy-arsed helmet.
- Fun and freedom of speech has officially ended at the Uni of Merryland. "Rock and Roll, Part II" has not only been banned from Terps football games, but now basketball games. Maybe if Duke didn't suck so much kak in the 1st place, this wouldn't even be an issue. [via and all a-polly-gees to Navi the Blue Devil Dog]
- Pitney Bowes is auctioning off autographed envelopes. The person who bidded on Ryan Seacrest's should be flogged in a public square.
- The Shawshank Redemption breast film to not win Breast Picture? Uh, hello, Citizen Kane (or perhaps Coz' pre-Peabs work in Ghost Dad)?
- Warner Brudders delays the release of Ollie Stone's Alexander, claiming it'll help their chances with Mr Oscar. I dunno bout you, but after seeing the trailer, they should start preparing Razzie speeches.
 |
- Love Ohio State and need a sweater? Bid on this phatty sweater.
- Be the first on yer block to visit MoMA: Revenge of the Sith.
- Do you have a NFL stadium fetish? Click here.
-
- Steeler QB Ben Roethlisberger got em self a website. And thanks gawd the url aint benroethlisberger.com. Cause who would ever remember how to spell that sheetz?
- Dumbestist thing of the week. [via Zach de la Roachclipper]
- Plastered outta yer mind on St Ides? Don't drive a car, ride a horse!
- Go to CVS, buy a stomach and save 4 whole dollars!!
Wednesday, September 22
Breast In Peace
 |
- FUGEES REUNITE (!!!!) at Chappelle's Block Party!!! Pras can now finally pay his electric bill.
-
- Barbara Walters bids adieu to John Stossel and his mustache this Friday on 20/20. And bless the men in suits who OKayed this muy bonita chica as her replacement! I wanna run my dedos thru her pelo all noche long.
- Baseball may be coming back to DC! Get a life or a real city Northern Virginia.
- Preview the new R.E.M. album [via ProductShoppeeNYSea]
- Flavor Flav is making it safe once again to wear Viking helmets.
- I wonder what the reserve price was for Mother Nature's Undercarriage? [via Zach de la Roachclip]
 |
- There's a pre-sale for The Used show at Roseland tomorrow at 10am. The password is 'memories'
- George Bush covers 'Sunday Bloody Sunday'. [via My Man Marvkus via Black Table via con dios]
- We're the 3rd most popular link when searching for 'grundle ball sweat'. My parents must be so proud!!
- When life hands Evan Dando a lemon, I guess he decided it was time to make a new Lemonheads album. Good, cause I'm dying to know if Ray is still shameful after all these years.
- Hilton/Lohan 2004: The T-Shirt!?!?!! Crapsticks!!! Someone beat me to the punch. Anyone interested in Lohan/Dukakis '08 shirts I have in the works? Also, does anyone know of a better tee place that CafePress?
 |
- To hell with the Rock, this chick is the real Scorpion King. By the weigh, if yer a Scorpio like me, you rule the world, but you probably already know that.
- Lettuce juss say that this guy wouldn't make the cut for the animated gif-ted and talented class. [via Penna Pastahead]
- Watch the boy in the background (NSFW) [via Lil White Chapel]
- Man Shoots Wife, Mistakes Her for Monkey. Now that's love!
The Jude Laws of Attraction
Wimbledon
Game, Set, Snatch
If this movie were called US Open and revolved around a washed-up American tennis player taking his last shot at winning it all, it would probably be the wurstest movie since the last 7 Julia Roberts pictures. But it isn't folks. It's about a British bloke and its from the (nia) peoples who brought you such fluffy crap as Four Weddings and a Bunghole, Notting Off, and Bridget Jones's Diarrhea. Those f-in Brits have some sort of voodoo on us, the American audience, cause you can't help but being charmed to death by them. Was Love Hactually actually a good movie? No, but they stuffed every frame with a zillion irresistible Brits that by the time the credits were rollin, we were all ready to denounce our citizenship and hop on the first flight to Heathrow. Anywho, Wimbledon aint no a Schindler's List, but it'll charm you more den a Charms Blow Pop. The plot is more predictable than 72-hour-non-showered vagina smelling like tunafish. And the biggest conflict in the entire movie is whether Sam Neill is going to crack a smile or not. And boy o boy does my man Paul Bettany has the breastest life ever. On screen he gets to dilly dally with ultra-hottness Kirsten Dunst (and if you think she's nasty, please, cut off yer penis and keep it away from this dot.whorg) and off screen he gets to make babies with uber-hotness Jennifer Connolly. They only way his life could reach more of an apex is if Monica Bellucci was his concubine. But I ask yous, has there ever been a good tennis movie? Or even a movie about tennis period! Exclamation point. The only one that comes to my mind is Hitchcock's Strangers On A Train, and tennis isn't even the focal point of the story. Criss Cross!! So I guess by default this makes Wimbledon the most frantastically mostest eggsalad movie about tennis, EVER! And tits a purrrfect flick for those of you with a g-friend or a b-friend. Did I mention that Kirsten Dunst was born to wear a tennis skirt?
Sky Captain & The World of Tomorrow
Looks Aren't Everytang
I can honestly say that I have never seen a anything like Sky Captain. It is one drop dead gorgeous (so is this t-shirt) piece of filmmaking. Too bad that's the only thing positive I can say cept that I'd bend over backwards for Jude Law. This should have been a fun romp like The Mummy, but it was more like a smelly rump roast. It also doesn't help that everythyme I see Gwenyie Palho now, I just wanna puke my tits off since she's the mother of Chris Boring's child. Or that Angelina Jolie's lips scare me more than dem lips in that '80s Twizzlers commercial.
Man On Fire
Let This Mothersticker Burn, YO!
Two facts of life: Denzel Washington can nevers have a bad acting day and Dakota Fanning is the mostest precocious, darlingist, loveliest, finestist, child actor that there ever was. I swear, every time I see here on celluloid, I just want to start bawling my f-in eyes out. It all started with her sirprizingly un-Oscar-nominated work in I Am Sam. I even shed a few tears when I saw her out act Brittany Murphy in Craptown Grrrls whilst on a plane to Jamaica, which has got to be in the running for most un-umcredible Brittany Murphy cruds Mt EVERerst (and that list is quite long)! I didn't get too wet between my eyes (you thought I was going to say thighs, didn't ya?), but I almost lost it when Denzel's ruff around the edges bodyguard character starting falling under her spell. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh! Anyways, soon after that tender moment occurred, lil South Dakota gets kidnapped and Denzy goes all ape-shit on her captors. This movie rizzzzocks. It's like The Bodyguard meats Kill Bill (vol 2, mind you!) meats the gritty look of Amores Perros. And Marc Anthony is in it and just cause he looks like Skeletor, doesn't mean the dude can't act! Hooray to Tony Scott who finally has made a decent movie! Top Goon? Beverly Hills Flop II? Enemy of My Intelligence? I guess it wasn't to hard to top any of those.
Freaks
The Kinda Movie That's Cool To Put On At A Party With No Volume On
Where else are you going to find a movie that contains a man with no arms or legs rolling up a cigarette and smoking it or a German midget talking about swiss cheese or a clown named Phroso or a family that looks like Stern's lackey Beetle Juice or a woman being turned into a chicken?!#$R%$h!!!
Prizzi's Honor
A Dishonor and Not A Pleasure To Watch
How on earth was this flick nominated for 8 Oscars? And how on Neptune did Anjelica Huston's supporting performance take home a statuette? She was in the movie for all of 9 seconds! It was like watching a boring episode of The Sopranos (take yer pick from the last 2 seasons). Don't even bother with this one unless yer dying to hear Jack Nick roll with a spicy Italian accent or see a performance by that guy.
The Girl Next Door
Time To Move Out Of The Neighborhood
Shame on you Luke Greenfield. May you be struck by lightning and covered with Durkees and hamster pellet poo. Somehow you directed a movie where sexbot Elisha Cuthbert plays a porn star and she doesn't get nekkid for one spanking second!! Not only that, but you made her fall in love with one of the most horriblistic actors this side of Michael Pitt: Emile Hirsch. Nothing is this 'movie' is remotely realistic. Well, I'm sure Timothy Olyphant is an asshole AND has awful hair. Who's Cuthbert's agent? Tell him to contact me a(warren)sapp about that lesbian Charlie's Angels I'm producing, co-starring Her Royal Thighness and I Beat Off To You K Knightley.
Game, Set, Snatch
 |
Sky Captain & The World of Tomorrow
Looks Aren't Everytang
 |
Man On Fire
Let This Mothersticker Burn, YO!
 |
Freaks
The Kinda Movie That's Cool To Put On At A Party With No Volume On
 |
Prizzi's Honor
A Dishonor and Not A Pleasure To Watch
 |
The Girl Next Door
Time To Move Out Of The Neighborhood
 |
Tuesday, September 21
I'm Anon Amos
And I'm A Linkaholic
- Breastest Lohan headline EVER: Dad Defends Daughter's Breasts. And probably the wurstest thing about being Lohan's daddy is being able to talk about her (joe e) ta-tas, but not being able to draw a map of Hawaii on them.
- t.A.T.u. admit they don't drink from the furry cup and that their 'new' look and act will be 'hotter than ever before'. How is that possible if they plan on 'getting rid of their skimpy school uniforms'? Maybe they'll wear bras made of cream cheese and panties made of their own pubic hair! In the same article, there's talk of an Office spin-off with secretary Dawn and everyman Tim. [via StereoBritKnee]
- Heard about the banned Streets video for "Blinded By The Lights"? Well, czechs it out here: Windows Media jounks or Real Player stizzups. [1st link via U of Grambsy]
- Typing about Grambs, what the deli-yo wit dis: Whatev.org?
- Rest in peace MisShapes, cause yous just got the NYThymes treatment. And who the hell is this Sarah Lewitinn Spinstress anywayzit? I dunno, but I hear she's been so much fun since she started blogging again. Wink wink, nudge nudge, dig doug. [via Chillary & Cewebrity]
- Astralwerks Showcase for the CMJ-A-Thon, starring The Concretes, VHS or BETA, Sondre Lerche and The Golden Republic, Thursday, October 14th @ Bowery Ballroom. More details to come soon....
- Kerry may not have a plan, but he does have a brain. I don't think the other guy does. See here.
- Da Da Vinci Code gotz banned in Lebanon. Dang, I guess Rony will have to buy all the copies for the rest of the Seikaly clan.
- What the fudgecicles is this crap? NICKEL PLEASE!!! When did the gov-mint decide that TJ should look like one of the half-assed drawn cartoon characters in Bass/Rankin's bastardization of The Hobbit? I blame Bush. Vote Lohan/Dukakis in November. [via Kid Kadoji]
- Liam Gally-grrrrrrrr and Ricky Gervais team up to re-record David Brent's 'hit' single, "Free Love Freeway". [via GoldenFiddleFaddle]
- Here's an interesting idea: Dude finds a camera's memory card in a taxi and posts one of the pictures each day and narrates as if he was the person who actually took the photos. He calls it: I Found Some Of Your Life. [via Cefarooney]
- The most pointless event to look forward to in 2005: 26th Annual Mooning of Amtrak. [via Made of Brawnsteeen]
- Bid on HAL 9000 leftovers or a knife from The Shining. [via Navi the Barbarian]
- Vertically challenged girl who loves boning and can 'suck a basketball through a garden hose' is looking for some companionship. Inquire within. [via Zach de la Roachclip]
- Looks like Miss Alabama's website was created circa 1995.
- Retrocrush reveals the 50 Coolest Monkeys! Grape Ape got the shaft.
- Roger Ebert finally gets himself a real website... well sorta. And judging by this picture, he loves the band L7... well sorta.
- What's this Jude Law Alfie remake all about? All I know is that he gets to bang Susan Sarandon and you can see it fo free!
- This be My Man Marvkus' favorite wurstest local commercial (Windows Media). It's quickly becoming mine too.
- I've had bad milkshakes before, but this is recockulous!
- Click here for a nasty ole NSFW animated gif.
- My Other Jesus is a Camaro: The T-Shirt [vonce again from Zach de la R]
- And here's some questions that make my anal itch: Can you use diesel fuel instead of regular gas? What the fudge is Bill Watterson doing? And seriously, Who Is Harry Crumb?
 |
- Heard about the banned Streets video for "Blinded By The Lights"? Well, czechs it out here: Windows Media jounks or Real Player stizzups. [1st link via U of Grambsy]
- Typing about Grambs, what the deli-yo wit dis: Whatev.org?
- Rest in peace MisShapes, cause yous just got the NYThymes treatment. And who the hell is this Sarah Lewitinn Spinstress anywayzit? I dunno, but I hear she's been so much fun since she started blogging again. Wink wink, nudge nudge, dig doug. [via Chillary & Cewebrity]
- Astralwerks Showcase for the CMJ-A-Thon, starring The Concretes, VHS or BETA, Sondre Lerche and The Golden Republic, Thursday, October 14th @ Bowery Ballroom. More details to come soon....
- Kerry may not have a plan, but he does have a brain. I don't think the other guy does. See here.
- Da Da Vinci Code gotz banned in Lebanon. Dang, I guess Rony will have to buy all the copies for the rest of the Seikaly clan.
 |
- Liam Gally-grrrrrrrr and Ricky Gervais team up to re-record David Brent's 'hit' single, "Free Love Freeway". [via GoldenFiddleFaddle]
- Here's an interesting idea: Dude finds a camera's memory card in a taxi and posts one of the pictures each day and narrates as if he was the person who actually took the photos. He calls it: I Found Some Of Your Life. [via Cefarooney]
- The most pointless event to look forward to in 2005: 26th Annual Mooning of Amtrak. [via Made of Brawnsteeen]
- Bid on HAL 9000 leftovers or a knife from The Shining. [via Navi the Barbarian]
- Vertically challenged girl who loves boning and can 'suck a basketball through a garden hose' is looking for some companionship. Inquire within. [via Zach de la Roachclip]
- Looks like Miss Alabama's website was created circa 1995.
- Retrocrush reveals the 50 Coolest Monkeys! Grape Ape got the shaft.
 |
- What's this Jude Law Alfie remake all about? All I know is that he gets to bang Susan Sarandon and you can see it fo free!
- This be My Man Marvkus' favorite wurstest local commercial (Windows Media). It's quickly becoming mine too.
- I've had bad milkshakes before, but this is recockulous!
- Click here for a nasty ole NSFW animated gif.
- My Other Jesus is a Camaro: The T-Shirt [vonce again from Zach de la R]
- And here's some questions that make my anal itch: Can you use diesel fuel instead of regular gas? What the fudge is Bill Watterson doing? And seriously, Who Is Harry Crumb?
Monday, September 20
Tits Lohan's World
We Juss Masserbase In It
 |
- Her Royal Thighness is dying to duet with Eminem and word has it that he really wants to meet her. I hear she also wants to duet with me, but my schedule's a lil too hectic at the moment. Speaking of her 'music' career, she's having issues on how to present her image. C'mon Lohandjob, alienate yer younger fans and dress as slutty as possible!
- Roman Lohanski thinks Heinz ketchup is 'Burger-licious'. Boy would I love to stick my meat in between her buns. Did I just type that out loud?
- The Mean Girls DVD takes on the Star Wars Box Set at stores tomorrow. Either way my pause and slow-mo buttons will be broken by week's end. Gotta love Leia's metal bra or this website dedicated to it.
- Mrs Thigh Master to grace the cover of next month's GQ.
- LL, who ROX, was heavily teased as a child cause of her red hair and freckles. Now she does all the teasing. And I'd like to bovs her f-in teesings.
- And Frecklejuicy's infamous nip slip, from a few moths back, made the back pages of this month's Playboy. Hopefully in a few years, she'll be gracing the front of it. [via McCrabbypants]
Lessons Learned
From The Weak End
 |
- Apparently the jelly bracelet I wear on my wrist isn't very hip in this day and age. I don't really care cause the greatest lil girl in the world gave it to me.
- It's hard to throw a spiral with a Nerf football.
- My sister and I were both very sirprized about the small amount of comments left regarding her engagement. So even if you don't know her, leave some comments below.
- The origin of UltraHottie's name.
- Cats are smart. My parent's cat, Lil Kitty, ran away last Thursday. Since it has no front claws, we thought its chance of survival were slim to dead. Yet a few days later, Lil Kitty came home. Probably cause it wanted to eat or watch the latest episode of The Surreal Life.
- Just cause you have Priest Holmes on yer fantasy team, doesn't mean yer guaranteed victory weak in and weak out.
- Eating chili always hurts my tummy.
Saturday, September 18
Lord of the Ramblings
Friday, September 17
Choosey Moms
Choose Animated Gifs
Kids 'N Play
To see who is who, move yer cursor over the pic.
For you Apple
Enjoy!
via Flea
Thursday, September 16
The Return of Mark 'Super' Duper Qwik Hitz
 |
- Beck's follow-up to his ultra boring Sea Change won't drop til early 2005. Hurry the funk up, cause I need sumtang to get yer 'back alley abortion of a performance' at Coachella outta my mind.
- Q Award nominations have been released. Will the Streets be alive with the sound of the Archdukes?
- The Warriors has never been screened in their home town of Coney Island... until it does on Rocktober 2, 10pm at Sideshows by the Seashore.
- Gary Oldman sez peace the fork out to Star Wars.
Herbie LoHancockeyed
 |
- Peace the fork out Johnny Ramone. Lets just say the 2000s haven't been kind to the Ramone clan.
- Candy corn is already on sale. And at 79 cent a bag, I could be Louie Anderson gynormus by Hollow-Ween. Please, someone has got get all Nurse Ratched on my azz before this gets any worserer. Damn you Brach's.
- British? Own a cell phone? Click here.
- McG must be destroyed.
- Driver Motors Wrong Way for 18 Miles. Sounds like the title of an album by two young quasi-lesbian Russian girls.
- The word 'assassin' has two asses.
- And is it just me and my thighs or has everyone gone Switched At Birth crazy lately? Czech out Ashlee Simpson's long lost twin or how bout deadman Bernie and lucky to be alive Roy? Well, to tide you all over, here's a half-a$$ed version of Bitched @ Swirth...
Wednesday, September 15
And We'll Party
Like It's 5765!
 |
The year number on the Jewish calendar represents the number of years since creation, as calculated by adding up the ages of people in the Bible back to the time of creation. However, it is important to note that this date is not necessarily supposed to represent a scientific fact. For example, many Orthodox Jews will readily acknowledge that the seven "days" of creation are not necessarily 24-hour days (indeed, a 24-hour day would be meaningless until the creation of the sun on the fourth "day").
Shofar, so good, but juss in case you didn't know...
Jews do not generally use the words "A.D." and "B.C." to refer to the years on the Gregorian calendar. "A.D." means "the year of our L-rd," and we do not believe Jesus is the L-rd. Instead, we use the abbreviations C.E. (Common or Christian Era) and B.C.E. (Before the Common Era).
Now break out the apples and honey, cause its time to make money!
Thighspotting
Forgot to mention this for days, but last Saturday, whilst me and Chillary G were enjoying a fine lunch at Westville, Paul 'Acting Stud' Rudd and his Wet Hot American Summer co-star Zak Orth were enjoying some omelettes with two ladies and one baby. Less than an hour after that, whilst me was looking for a hard-to-find pair of green Vans chukka boots at Magic Shoes, I bumped into ex-porn star-turned-'actor', Simon Rex. And if that wasn't enuff, this past Monday, as I was smoking a fag outside of my office on 57th, Paul Simon walked out of my building, dressed like he just woke up. Damn is he friggin tiny. I was dying to ask him if I could call him 'Al' or if he had diamonds on the soles of his shoes, but didn't get the chance. Howevers, if I ran into Lohan, I'd immediately offer her some vodka and proceed to hump her leg. Gawd I love NY.
Bratwurst
 |
- According to the press secretary for the Embassy of Kazakhstan, Borat doesn't know a thing about his home country. You mean to tell me that women aren't kept in cages? The national sport isn't shoot dog? And their isn't a movie called Dirty Jew? Damn, a day ago, I actually wanted to visit that country. So I guess they don't have problem with transport neither. [via Ism de Lindsay]
- Did a plane really fly into the Pentagon on 9/11 or was it something else? I never even thought about it until I saw this. Or is that just some conspiracy nonsense. Snopes seems to think so. [via BronxRose]
- On November 2nd, please vote and then have sex. [via MC Kan't Make It Up]
- Synthetic urine is all the rage these days. So is Kama Sutra in the classroom. [via Made of Brawnstein]
 |
- I'll bet you a zillion billion dollars that Tony Danza's character on his new show is also named Tony.
- Yuri In Cab. Ali G rip-off or second-rate Ill Mitch? Either way, WTF? [via Shady Acres' Son]
- I love Travis, but they make some of the lamestist videos. Their new one is no eggception.
- John Waters' latest, A Dirty Shame, has its own blog. And with Remy Yorkish at the wheel, it's guaranteed not to be awful, unlike Zach Braff's blizog.
- Neue Yawkers, click here for a free screening of Alec Baldwin's latest.
- I never wanted to see Tracey Gold look so sad.
Tuesday, September 14
The Wet Dream Team
 |
- The Office 2-hour Special finally debuts stateside only on BBC America, October 21st. Czech out what genius Ricky Gervais has to say about it.
- Batman: Year 32.
- Guess who doesn't make money? Yep, bloggers. I'm so sick of reading these kind of stories.
- Got $2,950.00 + Tax to burn? Book a flight on Zero-G.
- Norman Chad, aka the Couch Slouch, takes on USA Today and their list of thangs to change in sports. I'm in favor of Slouch's #6: Pay college athletes not to come to campus during school week, thus freeing up the better-looking women for the rest of us.
 |
- You may have seen this before, but tits always worth a 2nd or 18th viewing. [via Jon Juan de Kur]
- Think Clint Howard is scary looking? You boviously haven't seen this pic.
- Ashton Kutcher's Restaurant Burglarized. Big whoop-d-do!!!
- Peppers, Vedder, and Rollins rock in honor of The Ramones. Next up: The Strokes & Blondie.
- And frinally, I need me time machine so I could have gone to see a screening of Tron with that dude in the male-camel toe Tron costume. Double dang!!! [via GoldenFiznizzle]
Monday, September 13
Lucas With The Lid Off
 |
- The Marlins set aside some tix for Steve Bartman at Wrigley. Speaking of the Bartman, where the frig is he? Supposedly he still lives in the western burbs of Chi-Town, after his petition for a job transfer to London never materialized.
-
[via OneGooodeMove]- Lettuce take a qwik trip around the blogosphere. Here be the breast blog names I've come across recently, Remember the Whalers and Donkey Boners and Other Debauchery. This may be old, but read the (peerless) priceless comments left for poser site, Whatevs.Blogspot.com. And can someone peas eggplain what this blog is all about? [last via The Whine Colored Sea]
- De La Soul enlist the help of Ghostface, Flavor Flav, and Common on their latest, Grind Date, which drops Rocktober 5th. Speaking of Flav, if you haven't been czeching out season 3 of The Surreal Life, you haven't truly lived. So f-in mint!
- I've heard so much goodness over the past year about the flick The American Astronaut that I'm slap happy it's finally going to play in a real movie theater. [via OuttaFocuszz]
- Engadget revisit the head clamp from A Clockwork Orange. Viddy well, little brother. Viddy well.
-
, yep flaming text.- Dougray Scott to be the next 007? At this point, they should have a different bloke play em each go around. Who doesn't want to see Bond flicks starring Ewan Mac, Judey Law, Clive Owen, Robbie Williams, and Richard Branson!?
- Hail to Joey Gibbs and the Redskins, but not these Redskins.
- If you don't have a brain or eyes, go see Ice Cube's latest.
- And are you a sick sick sick sick human being? Then go ahead and click this to see the pics from Playboy's Women of Video Games spread. Who knew that digital ladies shave their poonannys?
Sunday, September 12
MAZEL TOV!!!
MAZEL TOAST!!
CINNAMON TOAST!
Flea & her brand spanking new fiancé Made of Brawnstien!!
You go girl!
And you go guy!
This now leaves the Thigh Master as
the only bachelor left in the family.
Ladies, get in line!!
Saturday, September 11
C'mon, Get Happy!
Friday, September 10
Is It Football Season Yet?
Ells F#$KING YEAH IT IS!!
- My main man TK Stack Money, aka Tony Kornheiser, gets all sorts of jiggy in his latest opus, about the seconding coming of his eggscellency, Skins coach Joe Gibbs. I mean, the guy may be a geezer, but dropping rhymes like, Who imagined so many years after that tease/That Norv would have been better off with John Friesz? shows he may be hipper than most hip-hoppers.
- Speaking of Del Redskins, there was a nasty lil internet hoax going around on CBS.sportsline yesterday about Clinton Portis being out for the next 8 to 12 weeks. My boy and fellow diehard burgundy and gold worshipper, Jon Juan de Kurr, freaked the f-in freak freak when he saw that info and proceeded to leave frantic voice mails on the Washington Post's Mark Maske and Nunyo Demasio's inboxes. I applaud him for his dedication to seeking out the truth and his unyielding love for dem Hogs, but this was a bridge too far. I've since committed my compadre for psychiatric evaluation to prevent him from becoming like that bizatch stalking Catherine-Zeta-Alpha-Omega-Jones-McDonald-Douglas.
- By the way, Skins are going 17-0. Yep, they'll even win during their bye week.
- Next Strokes LP may not be out for years. Whys is that? So they can take their jolly-a$$ time learning every riff the Cars and the Clash ever riffed? Get an f-in haircut and shower you post modern hipsters.
- It's a dog eat dog world, and now apparently a dog shoot man world. [via Spakula Shaker]
- Noah Wyle to leave ER at the season's end. I honestly didn't realize that that show was still on. Must See TV, eh? Yeah, maybe if yer blind!
- Peace the fork out Mikey Eisner. Maybe now's the time they unfroze Walt and let him run the show again.
- This IS the world's largest bottle of catsup. Does it also count as the largest bottle of ketchup?
 |
- Green potato chips explained!!!
- I love these ads for Elle Macpherson's Intimates Lingerie. Hispecially the one of the topless chick with knives. Too bad not everyone agrees.
- The Dutch be so crazy. They have words like Neiwsjikciakskraewuiae, they let you buy the world's sickest ganj AND cheese, and they also pour Tabasco sauce on their crops AND have a 9/11 inspired film festival entitled, See, Fly, Die.
- How much awfuler can this Dukes of Hazzard movie get? Seann William Scott awfuler. [via Navi the Terrible]
- Andy Rooney loves the Soup Nazi. I love this planet so much.
- And finally, did Ali G ruin the world of bling?
Thursday, September 9
Digital Penetration
 |
- The WB needs to revive Dawson's Creek from the dead, cause their fall line-up stinks worse than microwaved chopped liver covered in crab guts. Commando f-in Nanny? Bloggah please, if Gerald McRaney needs the money that bad, we'll all send him 6 dollars to the APO of his choice. And Jack & Bobby? I'd rather see Sirhan Sirhan & Lee Harvey.
- I guess things are rather slow over at The Cack-Smoking Gun's newsroom, cause who really gives a flying burrito brother if Landon from Real World: Philagayphia assaulted a horse or not?
- Here's a list of 50 Weirdest Guinness World Records. Could you imagine having 98% of your body covered in fur or being 22.4 inches tall? I have enuff trouble getting around with my 22.7 inch dong [via My Man Marvkus]
- The Bermuda Triangle explained!!! Sorta...
- Click here if you want free passes to see Duran Duran perform on Carson Daly's 'talkshow'.
- New rings and things were spotted around Saturn's f-in region, I mean F-ring region. Ahhhhhh, that hit the G-spot, I mean the spot. By the way, whatever happened to 7-Up's Spot? Was he replaced by Orlando Jones, who was later replaced by Rolando Joans?
- Gorillaz, J5, Danger Mouse, and udders team up to help end genocide in Sudan.
- These CDs stink! And they kinda remind me of these floppy disks thingies my sister had in the 80s that did a similar thing.
- Too lazy to carry yo sunglasses and chopsticks? Tis yer lucky day!
- And to close up shoppe here, Dad Allegedly Attempts 8-Year-Old Son's Circumcision!!! That's purty f-ed up, but I still wouldn't ask Congress to pass a bill to end male genital mutilation. I don't like to mix my meat with cheese (see definition for smegma) [thanks for the tips Made of Brawn-steeen]
Five Alive
Ray
OutFoxxing The Competition
View Trailer
Write this down folks, cause at Le Academia Awards next year, Jamie Foxx will walk up to the podium and accept the Best Male Actor Oscar for his performance as Ray Charles in the masterful biopic Ray. He isn't an actor in this film, he's a Transformer like Optimus Prime. Cept he doesn't transform into a diesel truck, but love actually into Ray Charles. This performance has to be seen to be-leafed. And what a perfect tribute to the man himself who just passed away this past June at the age of 73. And I can't bee leave for one second that any other movie that gets released between now and Oscar time will contain a single performance this unrelievable, and I don't think Foxx will ever hand in a performance this recockulas for the rest of his long career, and the only other memorable performance that remotely sticks out in my mind from 2004 is Jon Heder's performance as Napoleon Dynamite, and this run-on sentence will end now... or will it?
I also gotta give oodles of props de leon to the casting department for enlisting the acting pork chops of BOTH Curtis 'Booger' Armstrong & Warwick 'Wicket/Willow' Davis in effective dramatic bit roles. Oh, Booger, what in the Right Said Fred happened to you? For you were the most under used and wasted talent that Hollywood ever produced. The writing was all over the wall of yer geniusness when you traded barbs as Herbert Viola with Agnes DiPesto on TV's Moonlighting. Cue Al Jarreau music. One last question Booger, why are you a member of the gang of Elusive Bicyclists?
Star 80
Bob Fosse Lives For Wet T-Shirt Contests
View Trailer
Yep, you read that right, Broadway golden boy Bob Fosse directed a movie that contained a wet t-shirt contest. But the biopic Star 80 isn't about many a soaked boobies, but only the boobies and bushland of 1980's PMOY, Dorothy Stratten, who was killed at the hand of her loser husband/pseudo-pimp, cooked to well done perfection by Eric Roberts.
And can you imagine anyone better to play an absolute sleazeball than Julia's brother? It also doesn't hurt that he sports a porno mustache. Other reasons to czech this out: you get to see many a minutes of Mariel Hemingway's boobies, Cliff Robertson's take on Hef, and a young Keenen Ivory Wayans playing a comic doing a "White man does this, black man does this..." kinda schtick.
Before Sunrise
A Vienna Sausage Fest
View Trailer
I was avoiding this flick like the plague for years. Probably cause Ethan Hawke's mid-nineties faux-tee really bothered me back then. But I owe it to Ethan to watch it. I mean, I worked on his directorial debut (good luck trying to find the name Thigh Master on that crew list). And me armor Julie Delpy (pro-noun-ced, Jew-lee Dell pea). I often wonder why our good friends over at NonUsHotties.8k.com have never added her to their prestigious list. So after finally giving in, I'm smacking myself for waiting too long to see this sucker. What a gem this Linklater joint is. It was so cute and precious, that I slept with the DVD in my arms that night. I am an eager beaver cleaver to be seeing the Sunset sequel, as the ending of Sunrise was so open ended. And plus Delpy's voice makes me want to pour lemon and sugar all over her and eat her like a crepe.
Lifeforce
Where Else You Gonna See Patrick Stewart's First Screen Kiss?
View Trailer
It's basically Alien meets 2001 meets Poltergeist meets Dawn of the Dead meets The Omega Man meets crap on a stick. Did I mention than an alien chick that looks human is nekkid throughout a majority of the flick and all she wants to do is seduce men? Intrigued? Thought so.
Klute
What Kind Of a Name Is Poon?
View Trailer
Can somebody please explain how Jane Fonda won the Best Actress Oscar in '71 for playing a prostitute? I guess all the voters were bowled over by the way her boobs looked in a turtleneck sweater. So you lady actressess out there, if you want to win the gold statuette, you need to start flaunting yer boobs. Like Julia Suckberts in Erin Boobbonovitch or like Helen Hayes in 1931's The Sin of Madelon Claudet (huh?).
If you can tabulate the amount of times I use the word 'performance' or 'boobies', and are the 1st to email me, I'll send you something!
OutFoxxing The Competition
View Trailer
 |
 |
Star 80
Bob Fosse Lives For Wet T-Shirt Contests
View Trailer
 |
 |
Before Sunrise
A Vienna Sausage Fest
View Trailer
 |
Lifeforce
Where Else You Gonna See Patrick Stewart's First Screen Kiss?
View Trailer
 |
Klute
What Kind Of a Name Is Poon?
View Trailer
 |
If you can tabulate the amount of times I use the word 'performance' or 'boobies', and are the 1st to email me, I'll send you something!
Wednesday, September 8
Ali Geez Whiz
- Although I've heard it's an absolute disappointment, me is still hexcited to czech out Sacha Baron Cohen do his thing in the 2002 flick Ali G Indahouse, which makes its US DVD debut on November 2nd (what a great b-day present that would make for the Thigh Master). The movie co-stars new Dumbledore Michael Gambon and Tim from The Office. We'll also finally get to see what his mate Ricky C and his girl Me Julie really look like. Peep the teaser trailer here.
- The fine folks over at Use My Computer have some of the mos umcrediblelicious Lohan pics me has seen in months! She's not even uber-tanned/Oompa Loompafied in any of them.
- The Archdukes claimed the Mercury Prize. That was probably the safest bet since the cancellation of The Mullets.
- White Stripes NOT to split. Meg White, time to withdrawal that application from Arby's and get back to banging dem drums and floppin' dem boobies.
- Defamer deconstructs the Jersey Girl DVD box art.
- That Bastard, who be so Magnificent has uncovered the true lost brother of John Kerry: Count Chocula (see last pic in 4th row)
- A lot has changed since I was a senior in High School. Peep this fab collection of senior photos. [via Posh n Beckers]
- Rappers, hip-hoppers, and flip-floppers will have to pay for every sample used. Who said that originality was dead?
- Sure Iran, sure.
- Tear For Fears are going to re-attempt to "Rule The World". What, the Gary Jules "Mad World" royalties not paying the bills?
- Man shoots himself while demonstrating gun safety. Oh how I miss my days in Bloomington.
- Catster, it's like Friendster, but even more lame.
- Neue Yawkers, two free flicks for ewes: Shaun of the Dead & What The Bleep Do We Know!?.
- A European scientist wants to create a DNA library on the moon just in case something bad happens to Earth. Lets send Lohan's DNA there first so future generations of Thigh Masters can enjoy her... thighs.
- These be some purty pictures.
- I know you want to own The Holy Grail & Jabba's bizatch Salacious Crumb (child not included). [via Navi]
- This has gots to be the longest review of Zardoz ever. [via Newbsy Russell]
- Guess which NFL team makes the most cash? Yep, the greatistist organization on the planet, The Washington Redskins. [via Senor Gombiergas]
- Play Mary-Kate Olsen's Crack-Man at yer own risk.
- German Caught Having Sex With Doll. Thankfully it wasn't with Kid Sister or My Buddy. [via Made of Brawn-stein]
 |
- The Archdukes claimed the Mercury Prize. That was probably the safest bet since the cancellation of The Mullets.
- White Stripes NOT to split. Meg White, time to withdrawal that application from Arby's and get back to banging dem drums and floppin' dem boobies.
- Defamer deconstructs the Jersey Girl DVD box art.
- That Bastard, who be so Magnificent has uncovered the true lost brother of John Kerry: Count Chocula (see last pic in 4th row)
 |
- A lot has changed since I was a senior in High School. Peep this fab collection of senior photos. [via Posh n Beckers]
- Rappers, hip-hoppers, and flip-floppers will have to pay for every sample used. Who said that originality was dead?
- Sure Iran, sure.
- Tear For Fears are going to re-attempt to "Rule The World". What, the Gary Jules "Mad World" royalties not paying the bills?
- Man shoots himself while demonstrating gun safety. Oh how I miss my days in Bloomington.
- Catster, it's like Friendster, but even more lame.
- Neue Yawkers, two free flicks for ewes: Shaun of the Dead & What The Bleep Do We Know!?.
- A European scientist wants to create a DNA library on the moon just in case something bad happens to Earth. Lets send Lohan's DNA there first so future generations of Thigh Masters can enjoy her... thighs.
- These be some purty pictures.
 |
- This has gots to be the longest review of Zardoz ever. [via Newbsy Russell]
- Guess which NFL team makes the most cash? Yep, the greatistist organization on the planet, The Washington Redskins. [via Senor Gombiergas]
- Play Mary-Kate Olsen's Crack-Man at yer own risk.
- German Caught Having Sex With Doll. Thankfully it wasn't with Kid Sister or My Buddy. [via Made of Brawn-stein]
Real World: Philagayphia
Libertees & Justjizz For All
Real World turns 15 and to celebrate, it's now 300% more gayer than ever. Sure, there's only two guys who are out of the closet (Willie & Karamo) from the get go, but the remaining two males (MJ & Landon, who could both easily play Christopher Atkins in a Blue Lagoon remake) are early trung candidates for heteroflexibility. But who really cares when the real stars of the show are Sarah and the 8th roommate, the lovely and very talented... Sarah's bosomy, busty, buxom, curvaceous, and voluptuouslicious breastszs. And as the BlogFather might say, bovs to those effin tees, even if they're fake plastic tees... I smell a Radiohead song in there somewhere. Call the country club cause we need some tees timeages.
A Poor Richard's Almanac version of Lohan
I wish I signed up for this season's show cause with 2 of the guys straight up gay and 2 more on the way, she and her tees would have all been mine for buttering.
A Poor Richard's Almanac version of Lohan
I wish I signed up for this season's show cause with 2 of the guys straight up gay and 2 more on the way, she and her tees would have all been mine for buttering.
Tuesday, September 7
Separation of Church & Stains
 |
- Ever wanted to be the Skipper or Thurston Howell the III or bone a movie star and Mary Anne? Sign up to be a castaway on TBS' The Real Gilligan's Island. Too bad the Real Gilligan doesn't give his blessing.
- Or think yous gots what it takes to be a Harlem Globetrotter? Send yer info to Arizona.
- Fantabulous pairings: TiVo and Netflix, Stan Lee + Hugh the Hef, pecan waffles and my mouth, and Her Royal Thighness & His Royal Thighness.
- These bars of soap are killer! [via Zach de la Roachclip]
- Speaking of Mr Zach de la Roachclip, he's my boy and the f-in genius behind those Juicy Fruit ads where the pinata comes to life at a party. Well, his genius is on display once again with this Dummy ad for J-Fruit.
- We all love watching biznitches beat the fork outta each other. [via Curfurnurder]
- So did Santa Claus sip Pina Coladas at the North Pole 55 million years ago?
- Michael Moore wants more than a doc Oscar for his F-9/11. Would he be happy if Dinty Moore give him a lifetime supply of soup? And will the real Dinty Moore please stand up?
 |
- OK, which one of yous is going to buy me this Maryland Matters tee? I'm also searching for a Virginia Is For Losers tee if anyone knows of one. [via My Man Marvkus]
- "I was probably president because of Bob Redford." - Jimmy 'Crazylegs' Carter.
-
- Who doesn't want to visit Molvania: The Land Untouched By Modern Dentistry? [via Pony Eggspress]
- Olav Heyerdahl to direct the sequel to grandaddy Thor's hit Kon-Tiki.
- Got a great idea like creating the world's first underwater Trapper Keeper or non-smelly tuna? Submit yers to Ideas Happen and they may just give you 25K to make it happen. I also want to bring Fred 'Rerun' Berry back from the dead.
- Bored? Play around with this guy and this thing.
- And you'all butter hurry to yer local auction site for authentic Hurricane Frances memorabilia before it's all gone or worthless!
Monday, September 6
Labor Intensive Day
Weak End In Review
My summer started with an absolute MD/DC sizzle and ended on a MD/DC super-high stizzle. If you can remember my memo to Memorial Day, me rocked the Delaware beaches, saw Live play live in the burbs for free, fed a talking pig trash, played air hockey, was tempted by a 'Best Sub Deal In America' advertising ploy, and hung out with me family & friends and my boy Jedidah. Well, Labor Day weak end came and passed and the only thing it had in common wit Memorial Day was that I chilled wit the fam and Jed. This time around I was joined by my brothers-in-arms and co-owners of my fantasy football team, The Nasty Shwag, The Thinker & The Steiner.
It all started Saturday when me and The Thinker went to pick up our thrifty piece of shit car from Thrifty. They were all out of cars from their fine line of economy mobiles, so they offered us a lovely Chrysler Sebring convertible at no extra charge. (bi the weigh, car rental agencies are the only way most Americans will ever drive American cars). I was quite eggcited as I don't get to drive too often and the fact that I've never pimped a ride in a true convertible (unless you count a Corvette with t-tops). We headed down the ugliest turnpike known to man, the Dirty Jersey one. Half the way into our trip, right where Delawhere bleeds into Merryland, we stopped off at the mecca of roadside eats: Le Waffle House. 10 seconds and 76 lbs of eggs, waffles, and meat later, we were all in a food coma and back on route to Rocktown.
Later on Saturday, we peeped out my boy Davey Lashinkins & his lovely wife's fine DC abode, scarfed down some Mexicano comidas with crew + Jebidiah, met up with Joe E Tartar, and downed some brew and other brain cell killers while czeching out the hot biznatches at Sequoia in G-town.
Sunday had three goals:
1) Museuming - once again packing as much culture in a window of less than 4 hours. Didn't break my recent record of 5 with the Steiner (Met, Frick, Gugg, Neue, & Whit), but didn't do too shabby either rocking and pin-rolling thru the freeze dried ice cream at Air & Space Museo, gazing at the the money Monet's, Manet's, and mayonnaise at The National Gallery of Art (both East & West wingers), and paying mad respect to Oscar the Grouch, Mr Roger's neighborhood sweater, the Fonz' jacket, and Archie Bunker's chair at The National Museum of American History.
2) Crabbing - yep, I hate crabs again. I mean I ate them again. This time with me ma and pa, sis and bro, their loved ones, and a cast of thousands... who came by for dessert. And oh boy, dem desserts! I lucked out with the greatest mumsy ever cause she never forced me to eat boring vegetables that I didn't like and she always made/makes the must yummy scrumptiousdiddlyrecockulous treats you did ever have ever eatenen. She whipped out a key lime pie, a chocolate-chip cookie pie, a peach cobbler, and some chocolate-peanut butter square thingie things. [Note: if you ever want yer mother to make u umcredible eats for no dang reason, make a point of complimenting her cooking from this day fwd]
3) Bowling - at the alley where I pitched a 231 over the July 4th weak end, the Bowl America in Ghettosburgh, MD. The six of us (myself, My Man Marvkus, Joe E Tartar, Jebidah, the Thinker, and the Steiner) happened upon the greatestist deal of the century. For 12 measly bones, you could bowl as much as you wanted to from 9pm to 1am. Sure I thought we'd knock back 3 games, but 6 or 7? That's f-in Lebowski Fest propositions. And with the money we saved, we put it all into alcohol, which never improves one's game, but makes the sport seem rather Herculean.
Monday had three goals:
1) Draft the rest of our keeper-style fantasy football team (see complete roster below).
2) Leave town.
3) Eat at Waffle House... again!!
Lessons learned from the not so weak, weak end:
1) If you've never been to a Waffle House, you shouldn't be allowed to vote or live in this country.
2) Washington DC is perfect for families with no money... all the museums are free!
3) Freeze-dried ice cream is still the ice cream of the future. Die in hell Dippin-Donts.
4) People who are allergic to cats shouldn't stay in a house with cats.
5) Live fantasy football drafts are the new crack-cocaine.
6) My mother and father are the breastestist (an ongoing lesson).
7) Never eat female crabs.
8) By law, it should be a right, not a privilege, to drive a Chrysler Sebring convertible.
And without further Freddy Adu, here's yer 2004-05 line-up for
Le Nasty Shwag
Quarterbacks
Running Backs
Wide Receivers
Tight Ends
Kicker
Defense
 |
Later on Saturday, we peeped out my boy Davey Lashinkins & his lovely wife's fine DC abode, scarfed down some Mexicano comidas with crew + Jebidiah, met up with Joe E Tartar, and downed some brew and other brain cell killers while czeching out the hot biznatches at Sequoia in G-town.
Sunday had three goals:
 |
 |
 |
Monday had three goals:
1) Draft the rest of our keeper-style fantasy football team (see complete roster below).
2) Leave town.
3) Eat at Waffle House... again!!
 |
1) If you've never been to a Waffle House, you shouldn't be allowed to vote or live in this country.
2) Washington DC is perfect for families with no money... all the museums are free!
3) Freeze-dried ice cream is still the ice cream of the future. Die in hell Dippin-Donts.
4) People who are allergic to cats shouldn't stay in a house with cats.
5) Live fantasy football drafts are the new crack-cocaine.
6) My mother and father are the breastestist (an ongoing lesson).
7) Never eat female crabs.
8) By law, it should be a right, not a privilege, to drive a Chrysler Sebring convertible.
And without further Freddy Adu, here's yer 2004-05 line-up for
Quarterbacks
Running Backs
Wide Receivers
Tight Ends
Kicker
Defense
Friday, September 3
Chewbaccagammon
- Who on earth or in a galaxy far far away is going to buy the Ewoks and Droids cartoons on DVD? Both of em are slightly a lil less awfuler than the infamous Star Wars Christmas Special starring Bea Arthur.
- Speak-king bout Star Wars, did you know that Lando's boy Nien Nunb is considered an Asian Pacific Boy Toy?
- Ivana Trump is coming to TV this fall with some crap called Ivana Young Man. Worstest title and concept since Warner Bros' Juwanna Mann. I'm developing my own reality show called, Ivana Hump Ivanka.
- Mark McGrath, pick up a white courtesy phone cause yer career is over. "IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII just want you to fly... the fork away from me you talentless pretty boy."
- Love Dan the Automator? Yer in luck cause Handsome Boy Modeling School round 2 drops in November, he's working on a 2nd Deltron 3030 disc, eventually a new Gorillaz thang, and for his solo album, Omakase, he has enlisted the help of Damon Albarn, Beck, Mos Def, Busta Rhymes, DJ Q-Bert, Black Rob, Beenie Man, John Medeski and the Blue Man Group. It doesn't get much butter than this.
- This woman's name has gots to be Amanda Hunginkiss. [via Zach de la Roachclip]
- BMWs all pimped out by Warhol, Lichtenstein, Calder, Rauschenberg, and Hockney.
- Paul Newman The Clown is available for Mall Openings and Bar & Bat Mitzvahs.
- It's unconstitutional to watch women vomit. [via Flea]
- How could my boyz and girlettes over at the UTZ factory have the yummiestest chips, but no taste when it comes to football?
- The Maryland Terp band will no longer be allowed to play "Rock and Roll Part II" at football games. That sucks more than Duke. [via Navi The Barbarian]
- The Trio network dishes out a second helping of their Brilliant But Cancelled series. On the docket this go around is Olivier Platt's Deadline and Parenthood starring the deadly combo of Ed Begley Jr AND Leonardo DiCaprio.
- Does this bootylicious model come with J-Ho's lingerie?
- Kill Bill 1 + 2 = 3?
- And fry-nail-lee, ladies, start practicing cause Squirting will one day be an Olympic sport. Have a greeeeeat Labor Day weak end folks!! [via Made of Brawnstein]
 |
- Ivana Trump is coming to TV this fall with some crap called Ivana Young Man. Worstest title and concept since Warner Bros' Juwanna Mann. I'm developing my own reality show called, Ivana Hump Ivanka.
- Mark McGrath, pick up a white courtesy phone cause yer career is over. "IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII just want you to fly... the fork away from me you talentless pretty boy."
- Love Dan the Automator? Yer in luck cause Handsome Boy Modeling School round 2 drops in November, he's working on a 2nd Deltron 3030 disc, eventually a new Gorillaz thang, and for his solo album, Omakase, he has enlisted the help of Damon Albarn, Beck, Mos Def, Busta Rhymes, DJ Q-Bert, Black Rob, Beenie Man, John Medeski and the Blue Man Group. It doesn't get much butter than this.
- This woman's name has gots to be Amanda Hunginkiss. [via Zach de la Roachclip]
- BMWs all pimped out by Warhol, Lichtenstein, Calder, Rauschenberg, and Hockney.
- Paul Newman The Clown is available for Mall Openings and Bar & Bat Mitzvahs.
- It's unconstitutional to watch women vomit. [via Flea]
 |
- The Maryland Terp band will no longer be allowed to play "Rock and Roll Part II" at football games. That sucks more than Duke. [via Navi The Barbarian]
- The Trio network dishes out a second helping of their Brilliant But Cancelled series. On the docket this go around is Olivier Platt's Deadline and Parenthood starring the deadly combo of Ed Begley Jr AND Leonardo DiCaprio.
- Does this bootylicious model come with J-Ho's lingerie?
- Kill Bill 1 + 2 = 3?
- And fry-nail-lee, ladies, start practicing cause Squirting will one day be an Olympic sport. Have a greeeeeat Labor Day weak end folks!! [via Made of Brawnstein]
Someone May Have Said It Once Before But It Bears Repeating
Munster, The Old Man of the Mountain, Kerry, & Lurch
And if they all had a child together
it would look sumtang like this
Did you hear Bush's speech last nite?
He invented a new Spanish word, 'atross'
(click here for Real Media clip & skip to 25:46)
Whatta maroon.
Now please leave NYC.
Vote Kerry
or Lohan/Dukakis!
Thursday, September 2
Milk Maid In Manhattan
 |
- Doing anything on September 18th? Why not go to Dave Chappelle's block party located in a secret Brooklyn location, and featuring the likes of Kanye West, Mos Def, Lauryn Hill, Common, Talib Kweli, Erykah Badu, Jill Scott, Dead Prez and The Roots!! And the breast part, it's all fo free! More info here. [via ProductShoppe]
- Lohan dances in a cage and flies in a helicopter with a hot guy. Is this that recurring dream I keep having or her new music video? [via Stereoshizzle]
- Speaking of Her Royal Thighness, why don't you buy this crappy shirt she designed for charity. Hilary Muff's aint much better.
- Britney's ex-'husband', the thin Jason Alexander, hooks up with a she-male. [via Deshamer]
- The Lollipop Kid and the First Trumpeter in The Wizard of Oz were disinvited to an annual Oz festival. If things get any worse, they may have to perform tricks on next summer's Ozzfest or whore themselves out to Dunkin Donuts to promote their Munchkins line.
- Paris Hilton may be too busy selling crap to appear in crap.
- Ever wonder what Scott Stereogum looks like? Gothamist reveals all!!
[thanks Gid]- Meet the world's wurstest karate student. [vid via Kurt Vonnegutwitcha]
- While Travis begins work on their next masterpeace, they'll drop a semi-greatest hits disc and a DVD this fall. Bi the weigh, Travis f-in rules. They're 76 times butter than Coldboringplay and kick Phish's a$$ when it comes to covers. If you don't bee leave me, download their takes of 'Hit Me Baby One More Time' and 'Here Comes The Sun'. And oh yeah, you can stream their new single, 'Walking In The Sun' here.
- Bid on these mad props from movies: a Hattori sword, lockers from the Big Lebowski bowling alley, and a 100 Pound note from the country of Zamunda. [props to Navi the Terrible]
- And here's the most sacrilicious thing me has ever seen: The Yarmulkebra. [via Amanda Huginki$$]
Dance Dance Revolution
Wednesday, September 1
The Final Frontier
Time To Break Out
The Scotties Tissues
 |
- Keira 'I beat off to you' Knightley sez she doesn't have the boobs to be a Bond girl. I wonder if former Bond girl Denise Richards has ever said she didn't have the brains to be a human.
- Gawd I love it when awful things happen to the Yankees. Bi the weigh, is baseball season over yet?
- Bobby Knight: The Sitcom. In the first episode, Bobby gets upset that his local grocery store no longer carries Count Chocula and precedes to throw cans of tomato soup at the manager. Ha! Ha! Ha! Oh that Bobby, he's filled with laughter!!
- Spider-Man reviews crayons, just in time for the new school year.
- This Coke website is like visiting the World of Coca-Cola in Hotlanta, without the free tasting rooms.
- Take a peep at The Smoking Gun's collection of create your own stamps.
- Astronomers found 4 new planets. I say we give em cool names like The Planet of Sound, Phantom Planet, the Forbidden Planet, and Planet Jackson.
- Can you bee leave that $95,100 wasn't enuff to win a Disney World monorail car? [via Navi the Terrible]
- IKEA kills.
- The Archduke's frontman, Alex Kapranos has teamed up with Del Tha Funky Homosapien for round two of Handsome Boy Modeling School.
- The 1993 doc about Blur, Starshaped, is finally being released on DVD, with tons of extra goodies. Too bad I think its a UK only release.
- Things that are so wrong, they're almost right: AC/DShe and Mandonna. [1st one via Zach de la Roachclip]
- Sign up for free tickets to see Dunst in Skirt: The Movie (aka Wimbledon). And for jew Neue Yawkers, why not sign up for free tix to Resident Evil 2, Silver City, and Cellular.
- And merry merry b-day to The Thinker! We're all going out to celebrate at the Bowery B-room tonight. On tap is EL-P, Aesop Rock, The Perceptionists, Dieselboy, and Junior Sanchez (not Dirty's brother).
Counter Culter
Congratulations Ms Washingtonienne!
You officially have no shame!
Not like you did before!
Yer mumsy must be so proud!
TWS.org recently welcomed its 100,000 customer!
Maybe now I can finally fulfill my dreams
of appearing in Latin Inches!
